Blue Crystal Night



Blue Crystal Night


This is the structure of the conscious dream of the human being

It is in the 13 day process of

Yellow Human Wavespell


This is a very intense time on planet earth.

I am writing this brief blog in Encinitas California.

I am having one of the most profound experiences of my life


it feels very dream like

that I am even here

let alone what I have been experiencing over the past 3 weeks.

Lots of pics on my Facebook page 

Tomorrow I am off to Sedona



huge emotions coming up for me.

This is a Gateway time on my path.

I have now completed my 260 day cycle of

Blue Solar Hand


am in 3 months of working with my entry into a different world

of being what is known as a Mayan Elder

having completed my four 13 Year Cycles and Castles ~ my 52nd birthday 

My next solar return is

Yellow Planetary Human

where I will see my manifestation of my Human Being journey

which is totally synched to today

as it is the 10th step of the

Conscious Dreamer Wavespell:

Blue Night

Uranus in Taurus

is highlighting


Moon in Taurus.

I have had several Gateways like this in my life

when I have experienced a profound change


I recognise the symbology and patterns 

I see how my life path has shaped my conscious dream


now that I am working on a different level

from a much more consciously aware space

It is even more magical

As we start to clear out old fears and conditioning

we can see new pathways opening up 

We are now in

Gemini Sun



Leo waxing Moon

as I write this

going through the last degrees :

Inside Degrees 

LEO 29 
A broken sword. 
Consecration to a higher power. The giving-over of the personal will–the marvel of root change. Coming to the end of your own path, and it is just the beginning of the greater way. The heart must open. The infinite must be born inside. The destiny-necessity is there–so much karmic backlog. So many ways to be right and to be wrong. The realization in the very midst that there is nobody listening to the old tale and everybody is awaiting somebody else to come through. A profound and utter doorway into a great unknown. What has been is finished. What shall be is so very different. And what is now is a question and a prayer and a destiny that must find its redemption.


LEO 30 
A woman sprinkling rose water in the four corners of a room. 
Doing inner work in an outer world. Precipitating limitless spirit into dense matter. Working within higher laws. Tapping the sourcespring of existence. You are powerfully motivated to extend the range of the inner brightness into absolutely every facet of existence. So intensively purposive that you push yourself over every edge to achieve astounding things. You specialize in turnarounds, great shifts–personally and collectively. A vision burns through. You know that if you extend yourself just another notch further, the victory will be won. A knack for staying in there till something gives. A greater center of selfhood endows you with a central life radiance of unsurpassed glory. However, you tuck infinities away and appear as whatever is called for. And if your essence-spark shines through, it is incidental to the great design of bringing heaven to earth and being the one who makes that possible, selflessly and joyously and serenely.

Lots of intense Astrology this week

building to bank holidays in the US and UK at the weekend


Moon in Scorpio

It is a time for seeing our human experience in full flow

no matter where we are ~ how are we?

Having a huge pattern interrupt in a new place with new people has been profound and heart opening and reveals my core integrity

I have not laughed so much in years


felt things so deeply

felt love so much and so often

in this place

which has given me so many insights

I am intending to video and post more over the next few days Here is a fab Astro podcast from

Lots of love to you fellow travellers on your path at this profound time 






Solar Return Day ~ light returning


Happy Solar Return

Human Beings 

Code 9

in the

Human Being Wavespell

Yellow Solar Sun


Here is the process

Book of Thoth 4

Today is a very important day 

This process is a very important process

and it is happening 

right here right now

with or without the human beings conscious consent 

It is happening on all levels of coding

and depending on where each human being is on their personal process…

there is only a difference in perception

Mickey Mouse and Pluto are the language of light

Mickey the Magician

Pluto his inner dog 

and hold the process of enlightenment

as equally as any other sage or saint in history


this is overlooked by many a traveller on the yellow brick road looking for

TheWizard of Oz

Mixing their metaphors

and getting lost with too many signs

The famous duo are characters in various dramas

All part of turning a swamp into a very abundant place in the world

where vast fortune’s have been and still are unfolding

the new Disney offering

Inside Out 

is holding the key codes for the generation

who are really going to be working in a big way with

The Emotional Evolution

If you haven’t seen it yet I highly recommend

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell

The Enlightenment Process is there

in plain sight …

if a person is ready to see it

and there is the paradox

If a person is still deep in denial 


it is possible to be intellectually aware of code and process…

It is channelled code beaming through us all as human beings

It is the creation matrix we are all part of

To work with the code consciously however…

To be an Alchemist

To be a Magician rather than simply a mystic


One has to become the conscious process and that means doing the process literally whatever it takes to get off the

Magic Roundabout 


Once the human being really starts to be it

life does become really engaging and one can see that it has been there all the time that everything is fine and all the props have been totally synchronised to play the game

sometimes one forgets though

and this could be happening now for many as the heat is turning up

to get people out of the

hot tub of hedonism

in order to do a reality check

and remember

the truth of the matter

which is….

human beings are at a point of maturity of the outside and yet …

are still stuck in teenage years inside

which is why most are still doing the same old as they did then

which is not good for the planet

good for consumerism though

which is a by product of hugely inflated ego and can never been satiated 

Hence all the sickness in the world 

Are you aware of what codes you are running ~ from your youth?

Your magical structure?

Your pleasure dome?

If you are around my age and from the UK

then there was a diverse range of music to plug into

and embed

the Age of Excess

and hedonistic pursuit in the 80’s that is awaiting transformation 


letting go of the addictions of putting something in to get a high

If you choose notice the imagery

the language

how it feels for you

what your personal relationship is

with some examples from your golden oldies

Here are some of mine:

and yes of course they have a connection for me and

totally plugged me in to what I am working with now

which is why they are here of course 



Knowing that this was a code I used to run around co~dependency

part of me that has been conditioned

Looking for love in all the “wrong” places

Message in a bottle 

and huge bombardment of this co dependent code

anywhere there is media

and dense population

so once aware that the puppet strings are being pulled is key

being with that feeling


letting go of any need for instant gratification

is key for

The Joy Junkie 


because it is a designer hit as pure as any heroin trip

and it is key to understanding of what is forming personal motivation

in the here and now

A junkie is someone seeking a high to avoid pain

A person in pain because everyday life is not loving

and it is not a pretty picture

and it does not create a pretty picture 

Here is a man who explains addiction very succinctly:

We all have our own poison on the path

and it is what has to be experienced by the alchemist

to know it up close and personal

how it feels to be living hell on earth

not least because once this process really kicks in

it often means the initiate is in the minority

ostracised and scapegoated by the tribe

because all those still in deep denial will do anything

to avoid someone who is not in that place anymore

because in that reflection…

they see an aspect of themself wanting to get clean of distortion code

and open more to love and intimacy and that scares the living daylights out of their ego because it means…

going off the comfort zone and new learning

but rather than say that

~ be honest ~

the person that is literally afraid of their own shadow

will do a smoke and mirrors diversion and go into destroy mode

Personal motivation here and now is revealed in:

All the stories we were attracted to as children

the films that set our heart on fire or scared us to death

the sexual attractions triggering lust and longing

the emotional drives that fuel the core programming

and discover

it is anything but the logical part of oneself driving 

The Blue Bus…

is calling us


This can be revealed if the individual is ready to enlighten themselves

about themselves

and let Pluto take centre stage

as well as Mickey 

This really started for me in 2001 and although I was learning psychology I hadn’t yet discovered any tools to use

so I cried a lot and did not do what I always did at void crisis times

find a replacement 

get bombed every night

I watched films and cried ~ like Mrs Doubtfire ~ hoping this was my ex’s motivation for leaving me and the children for another woman

I also watched Fight Club

realising I was addicted to Ikea

ok and Brad Pitt 🙂 

Here are some of the quotes:

I nearly did not watch it because of the title but the fact Brad was in it tipped the balance 

Revolver is the same subject matter 

Twin Peaks 


Mulholland Drive



The Awakening takes part in The East ~ in the Mayan all the Red Codes

beginning with Red Dragon ~ the Great Mother


The Eastern consciousness

This is transformed in the West

in the Mayan blue codes


Is the Gateway of every Wavespell



is the

Gateway of the Mastery of enlightenment

code Yellow Sun

which is the end game position of the 260 day Mayan Wavespell synchronisation

process over and over eternally .

Yellow Cosmic Sun is the last Mayan Sign in this spiral 

So if

like me

 you have been feeling a tad 

ground down

over the past few years 🙂


Because your face doesn’t fit

and you are not

everyone’s favourite party guest

because well… you don’t party any more

and you don’t do denial at the same level

as everyone else any more

and you aren’t

one of the love a light brigade

and you are so sick of the bulls*t that

you want to projectile vomit it back

into the void it came from

 and all of that behaviour

is not a typical expression of 

Grace as recognised by the “spiritual” circles

and I offer that it is exactly that 

It is contrary mary at full return

What is known in Alchemy as 

Right Relationship

In alignment with 


free of any ego distortion

which is the

Tree of Mercury 


matching the transition of awakening to power happening here and now

We have to be ground down, crushed and shat out time and time again

often going into the desert and being in despair

and keep on going…

All of our personal code is the language of light

only some of it doesn’t know that yet 😉 

Madonna’s album

Ray of light

has some key vibes 🙂 


If you are ready to work with your code in this way

please get in touch 

I am not a guru

I am a human being going through a process

It is not my process

It is an ancient process

I do not own anything

I have no copyright 

I am sharing a way that comes from the source 

It is old alchemy school with a modern splicing



it really is magic 

for this magical new year coming 

Yellow Human ~ the challenge


Yellow Human Wavespell

Wavespell ~ Code 8 ~ Integrate


Day 2 ~ the new learning

Red Lunar Skywalker

What has always being getting in the way for my personal heaven on earth process ?

Not accessing the shadow that’s what 😉 

Then once accessing ~ integrating it 


This is the Yellow

13 day process in the White Castle of refining

 of what came into conscious awareness in the period of 52 days commencing 04 April 2015 at the start of this 260 day cycle

What were you doing back then?

This is the time of the Jason Journey


The human being ready to engage in going for the heart’s desire

Se off in the earthly landscape to find

love and acceptance of oneself


That is the key to accessing all of eternity and source code.

To do this requires turning everything on it’s head and being open to new learning and new process

We are the love we seek

Ok great concept yes?

Read 444 books on self~help and still no wiser?

Looking for love in all the “wrong” places is key

to the personal history

That is the key


Wherever the individual has experienced personal hell on earth

Is also where heaven if found

Simple as that

All our resistance comes from ego will

Wanting to have it’s own way 

Coming from an unwise place

often the ignorance of youth who believes they know best


this is key 

Has to happen

This is the crucible 

This is the place where the initiate begins to learn


This is the essence of today

The Fool 

The Green Man 


How all human beings so far have created the world experienced by human’s today

A study in this yields great insights

A personal study in personal causation of the individual’s current experience 

reveals great worth


Each individual is an expert on themselves

an expert on everything that has been wow so far ~ write it down

An expert on everything that has been painful, boring , uncomfortable

Ignore, push down, repress, drown out


That is what the masses are doing


missing the point entirely

and that is ok as all is revealed for each individual at the perfect time 


of being a human being

The “bad” stuff reveals all the code and emotion ripe for release

the juicy stuff



just like rotting fruit holds the seeds for the new trees

so the human being is free to do something else now

having learned on all levels

how personal heel was created

There are some shared human codes in there that apply to all human beings too



photo by my friend Dave Collinson

appeared synchronistically on my timeline on Facebook this morning

as an echo at a place I visited yesterday ~ a sacred site ~ the exact words I spoke there

Favourite lines from Gladiator

Anyone who reads my blogs will be familiar with me quoting this.

Gladiator is one of my favourite films ~ not the violence ~ the role of the man, who does not want power and for that very reason is given it.

He does right relationship even though he has been made to fight and had everything taken from him.

What each human being does has a consequence in the here and now ~ that is karma ~ not with a judgemental meaning ~ simple do this and create that.

This is creating code in action.

Each action that we take has consequences for everyone and everything in planet earth .

Each human being is a powerful creator of outcomes and it is time to fully own that.

Be do have .


We cannot create new worlds

from old worlds now that is very evident and to be seen in planetary history


When each human being changes the inner world

the outer world changes

That is the process of our human evolution

That is the peace process

Peace begins with me 


Be the change in this way and get to see that heaven is here

right now

on earth

It is simply the personal hell story getting in the way for each individual unable to access it 

Get clear of that

Experience the miracle of life

The amazing beauty of all that is

Be the gift

See the gift 

Know that 

Every single being is right on the edge of that quantum leap now

all that is required is accessing their visionary self and trusting the process


Everything that each person has done is the key to changing their destiny 

and changing the world

In that order 

That is the missing link 😉 

Get it?

Go for it?

The ecstasy is the natural essence from the agony

Vinegar into honey process


Love to you beautiful people 



Ready to become more aware?

Ready to work on transformation?

Whatever level you are at I have something to offer you and you are the expert on where you are at 🙂 

Upcoming Event:

Come and connect to me at this event in Southampton soon and find out your codes ~ share the magical process

14 July 2015

The Mayan Calendar 

The Enlightenment Process

click here for more info:

Pakal color

Richard Taunton Sixth Form College Hill Lane, Southampton, SO15 5RL ROOM 407/08
£5 Entrance 50p Refreshments
Doors open at 7pm for a 7.30 start

Bring your intentions with you and  an open heart for new learning 

This energy is

White Spectral Wind Day

The letting go of anything untrue 

being able to speak our truth


access our spirit guidance more

Want to start straight away?

Emotional Balance Online Workshop

with two entry levels


Information level 1

Information and personal coaching with me level 2

Book here

It is truly a Cosmic time lovelies



Cosmic Moon  

Day 9 today 

hkuyutrjpg copy

Super portal code for completing old ways and opening to new 

accessing Goddess Energy within

As I am completing this blog

Aquarius at 28 degrees

A tapestry loom. On it is a half-finished tapestry.
Karmic process restricts the self, curbs the self, dictates what must happen to the self. A work upon yourself and, far more strongly, an outer plane self-discipline has been in progress a long time. It must be resumed, taken further, no matter what. Unfortunately, this often means imposing duties upon yourself presumptively. You just do what you have to do. But if the heart is not in it, work becomes mechanical. A dilemma faces you at recurrent cross-roads: to stay with what has been set up, or to introduce innovations. Any such innovations represent a huge issue. But without them, the inner core of self is short-changed and the outer mind takes over. You are being propelled by a greater destiny-current to honor all karmic agreements, and to enhance these by bringing into play a vitally engaged present-time attentive willingness to be surprised, meet things from another side, and realize that everything is just beginning now and needs to be met with real passion.

Ready to weave a new planetary picture?


Today’s Thoth Tarot

8 of disks reversed



exactly what this blog is about

what we do in life echoes in eternity

what we sow we reap

time to turn everything on it’s head

and for those of a similar age to me this is all about the

Uranus Pluto dance that began in 1966

This is what our generation is here to do 

Ties into the Solar Eclipse in 1999

Yellow Seed Wavespell ~ Alchemy day


Day 3 ~ Alchemy
Today is

White Electric Worldbridger

Please click on the links to take you to other websites wholly independent of me 

The portals begin and so the building blocks of human evolution are beginning today

This Mayan Sign is ruled by Mars 

so get ready to rumble 

Mars is in Aquarius

and this transit is all about the New Age

of getting clear of old codes

and co dependent shenanigins 

that stop us from aligning with our pure source energy is the key 

to  direct access energy

If your day began like mine you may be feeling the triggers and the quakes

This is a testing day to see how centred we are


if we are ready to do the work required

or be pushed around

by aggressive forces

It is a choice point

Moon has gone into Leo in the UK

and so in waning moon

we are receiving what energies we gave out

in the first two weeks of the

New Moon in Sagi

Öèôðîâàÿ ðåïðîäóêöèÿ íàõîäèòñÿ â èíòåðíåò-ìóçåå

It was a potent one at 0 degrees

Depending on what level you are working at consciously

You may find you are feeling the ego big time ~ your own and other people’s

This is always based on past energetics triggering emotion seeking release

Remembering that our emotional reaction is always ours and our responsibility

We choose how we react to any given situation

Always 😉


If we are not consciously aware of this then we act accordingly

and often do the blame game

and project onto others

You may find yourself on the receiving end of this too of course

You may find someone telling you who you are and what you are doing


as they do not know you experientially at all

this is actually a mind read and assumption on their part

because it has to be doesn’t it ~ if they have no knowledge of you personally ?

There may be general rules that apply to the situation you are in

that may be appropriate of course

If there is emotional intensity on their part

and they are being threatening in any way ~

this is an instant indicator of them being triggered and so…

Is not actually about you and your behaviour at all sometimes

They are simply using you as a conduit to discharge their fear into


If this is happening to you today remember that this is actually power point time

This is revealing what your next steps to freedom are …


Today’s Mayan energy

is all about letting go of old worlds 😉

The majority of the people in the world do not know

how to have gentle



communication ~

primarily because we did not receive that when we were children from our family or our school

or our educating circle of influence

If we did not receive this energetically and experientially

then it is not within us
Our code does not contain it
Our consciousness does not contain it


and as much as we like to think we are these things

the reality is
we are not 🙂

How many people wear a

spiritual mask ?



Have an alter ego?

Play a role in a “profession”

Put on a way of being for public

Have a telephone voice

and yet in certain arenas ~

especially Facebook ~

the truth comes out as to anger about other people ?


How many people do you know on Facebook who put a status on saying they are going to “cull” people ?
That people have to play a game with them to remain?

All these duplicitous threads that our human being ego creates to be conditional because of our personal conditioning …

Yet if someone does that to us it is a different story ??????

How dare they 😉


Once we start to understand the nature of the ego that we all have

Every person on planet earth

then we realise our common ground

and if our ego is flexible enough and not too defensive

We can be open enough to laugh at ourselves


and start to work with our wound
and transform our ego
and truly take responsibility for how we respond

Initially this can be a big challenge

How to separate out what is you and what is me

and what we want to do to have co creative relationship

and come from a healing heart space

of authenticity

No person on planet earth is an evolved finished product

otherwise they wouldn’t be here 😉

So to start the ball rolling we can let our defences down
let go of the coping mechanisms that got us through childhood
stop trying to be something
being clever
being tough
being a ….


and level the playing field

be honest
say how we feel about other people’s behaviour to us
how we feel about it
stop making up “shoulds” about the people

we are all just people

we are all the same in many aspects

we want to be loved and accepted for who we are
and allowed to live a life that is this way of being

that is the bottom line free of ego

only our ego gets in the way and distorts situations with old ways that carry on the drama of our past way of relating

It is an intense time now

I highly recommend that you start doing your inner work because this energy is going to get bigger and bigger over the coming months

Our egos are expanding with Jupiter in Leo


This means those that are not conscious of their inner workings will be expanding avoidance techniques, fixes and denial strategies through the “other”

Whatever the poison
the amount required to soothe the wild child within …

the dosage is going to be required to be upped considerably


There are some squares coming next year

that are bringing pressure to our Saturnian Structures

to see if they are water tight

and can hold the energy we are creating

if we are building foundations on Sand

fantasy island escapes

get ready for the Neptunian wave that will smash the sandcastle

Hear the Siren Call
Feel the Sagi wound


Venus goes into Capricorn

today until January 03 2015

which just happens to be the start of

White Dog Wavespell

Sirius 2

The code of finding our tribe and Unconditional love ~ the Sirius Star

No one can love anyone until we love ourself

Anything that we are seeking to comfort ourselves outside of ourselves

will be a sticking plaster and will slide off after a couple of hours in the swimming pool of these times


time to go within and do a credit report on yourself 🙂

Reign in the ego by transforming it otherwise it will leak out when you are doing your best to distract it …


I can help you help yourself so get in touch if that is your desire

Truly though it is down to you

You come into this world and leave it

alone in one aspect

The responsibility is down to the sole / soul individual

What we do in life echoes in eternity and we cannot hide from this

The truth will always out

It is time to get those goat hooves on and prepare to climb the mountain


Down into the depths

and face those demons

Leo at 3 degrees

A rickshaw.
Hyperactive. Engrossed in sensations. Absolutely fascinated by the ins and outs of everything. Training yourself arduously to become completely present in the action. Insisting upon getting it right. Aiming for spirit and flesh to merge. Knowing how to do it and feeling sharply motivated. However, the little self does get carried away with the literal outward experience so very easily. You must battle to harness your powers and to pull yourself away from random delight. It is quite a journey, with one great thing going for yourself. You just know that you can do anything you set your mind to, and you are correct.

Time to grow up and realise that there is no fairy with a magic wand to do your work
On earth and in the astral planes

It is your job


So get your sleeves rolled up and get your hands dirty

Take the mask off
breathe in the air

and jump into the void ~ you know you want to let go ….???

Love to your alchemy today Cosmic Cookie Trailers

Yellow Human Wavespell ~ truth of the chalice


Yellow Human Wavespell 

 Please click on the links to take you to other websites

to expand on the information

This blog is me sharing ” a” way rather than “the” way “

My journey so far and my learning and the links are not linked to me or that place

and are wholly independent 


I have been brought into balance with a

heavy cold in the first half of this Wavespell

when the sun was in Libra


It has allowed me to recognise that I still haven’t fully integrated

the learning of this Autumnal Gateway

or how working with the shadow and allowing more sensitivity

requires different ways of being in the world 

and this way of being is getting stronger

with the return to balance of the sacred feminine

We are now learning

what ails us from not being cared for

and nurtured in the way we needed as children ~

so we can create new models

from this awareness

for our future generations by living it now 


Being the change we want to see is key


Resting allowed me to be still



partake of my home made elderberry cordial

The Elder is a protector and although some of it is very healing 

other parts are toxic ~ take care when working with this magical plant 

Do not use the leaves or wood to ingest in any way ~ do not burn the wood for example 

Many Elder’s planted  together can be intoxicating when inhaled

so wisdom required as always when working with nature 

and being very aware of what your intention is

Do whatever it takes to fully inform yourself of this information

before you begin


The Art of Alchemy is a powerful process

Here is a great blog on the Elder

This is key for me this year as I am in my

Yellow Rhythmic Human


which is all about bringing myself into balance 

If you look on the link above you will see how this great website reveals the way to do this 

very specifically 

by revealing the codes of  the

actual alchemical process:



Red Moon ~ also the year we are in on planet Earth ~ being the authentic beacon of light

White Wind ~ the breath of spirit blowing through us free of ego distortion and dishonest ~ learning to speak our truth no matter what ~ very challenging at times and often does not create polarity 🙂

If we do not we pay a big price for that 

Blue Hand ~ The Gateway of transformation ~ learning our conditioned codes, transforming them and learning and integrating new ways of being

Yellow Human itself ~ working with our humanity and human being avatar in an aware and respectful way ~ it is our vehicle for our spirit and the more we clear our conditioning , the more our chalice can be filled with our spiritual guide . This requires a lot of new learning for the majority of humanity.

Here is a link to a great pdf that gives lots of info about the Mayan Codes:




that my Leo ego self does not welcome the Autumn Gateway 😉

and still has resistance 

for me to bid farewell to Summer

and all that means

which is also a reflection of my bigger picture

and my cycles of leaving my youth

and ageing 

I love the changing colours

the shift to more time inside in some ways

but notice the impact has on my body 

and my mood 

of more dark hours 

and my body needing layers of covering 

and how that feels

Autumn has a huge impact on

the human being circuitry

The environment outside changes

The environment in our home changes

and other places we inhabit , when we live in a place that has significant seasonal changes


Remembering that what the majority of the world

believe is illness

and  as such a malady

is actually the healing process

bringing us into balance

Which is why there never will be a “cure” for the common cold

The more we start to understand this process of what creates being un well

and stop doing it

instead of trying to stop our body going into a healing process

because of what our will has decided to do and act on that is out of balance 

and in denial of our human being capabilities 

the more it does not have to happen and we let go of our living in denial way of life 

If the ego is allowed to decide to arrogantly believe that it knows better than consciousness

then we see the growing number of deaths and lawsuits for pharmaceuticals 

This one for example 

Fen Phen 

The Root causes are not being addressed and yet a miracle cure 

quick fix 

is sought so the ego over drive can carry on regardless 

Time for people to open their eyes

and realise that they are creating their lack of health in some way 

letting go of blame 

simply looking for a long term 

well rounded solution is the key 

Making changes on all levels to match living the well being code  

is what will bring about a new way of living for all when all are ready to do what that takes

and it starts with one person leading the way 

Peace begins with me

This is the polar opposite model of :


Our way of living template

created by “authority”

led by our collective shallow ego

from the conditioned out of balance

head led mind set






that believes it can control all universal realities

and overcome them

strap them down

measure them

and avoid any chaos

as it doesn’t understand the true meaning of life and the process and most of this code comes from early childhood and parental issues ~

in particular issues with Mother’s and how very different their experience was with their Mother from the Disney version of what a mother “should” be

which is a complete nonsense

and totally unachievable in today’s paradigm of home and family versus the reality which cannot actually be known by society as a whole anyway 

Think about it ….

What do you know about the reality of life for people who live in your neighbourhood and the gap between what media tells us is true and how would they know that anyway ?

The ego intellect stand alone model

has no access to wisdom

because it is running on will power alone

and cut off from higher self guidance ….

 there is no room for it 


Full to the brim with fear based beliefs

and running away from death

yet ironically creating a death culture

and trying desperately from this place of denial to create a positive spin 

a reframe position

of profiting from misery 

with big business in the pharma world

and the war machine 

and keeping the masses in survival mode by selling goods that have a limited life built in on purpose to keep the consumer consuming 


The “civilised” world is a very sick place to live in

Pathological in fact 

In big denial of truth and honesty 

Co ~ Dependency rules the waves

as different facets of the whole have no empathy or understanding of “the other”

and no inclination to learn or recognise that we are all connected

~ that is the holistic model after all

and so separation is impossible ~

what each cell does affects the whole planetary body

We are responsible for our collective creations

as we all impact on each other …

which is a pickle isn’t it ?

How to create a worldwide solution with people who are resistant to co operation and community

because of their early family life codes 

and would rather make a perfect vacuum cleaner to live in a showroom house 

than deal with how they felt as a child in their family house and how their boundaries

were not tolerated and as a result they became intolerant and….

Really angry 

No amount of vacuum cleaner sales

is going to clean up that feeling 


Living in balance is virtually impossible

in the way we live in the modern world

because of this resistance to what is 



Virtually all of it’s structure is founded on self~sacrifice and imbalance

This is why we push our body beyond it’s limits

Damage ourselves

Do not heed the early warning signs

We are brainwashed to “go the extra mile”

especially in business and sport

The two great distraction arenas

that allow avoidance of seeing life

in it’s true colours

and create all sorts of ego distorted behaviour and abuse

Here is a film about that arena in one aspect and it is a very challenging subject 

When we have too much yang energy coming in

which is the patriarchal pattern just now ~ at the extreme 




Often aggressive

On the fear spectrum

On the ego spectrum

Un ~ natural


Our human being sentinel system

has to stop it and create a sanctuary

Reverse the process and bring balance

Create Yin within




Regenerate space


Shut down oncoming by blocking the receptive openings

Moisture for the airwaves

lines the incoming channels to calm the inflamed orifices

and all the emotional energy is felt in the body

Aches and Pains

Re~ hydration is required

Lots of fluids

Lots of sleep and low energy output

to allow the body to fully heal and restore

Remove the residue of the stressors

This is happening to most people all day every day

being in out of balance scenarios

because that is what is currently the accepted modus operandi

Most people are therefore experiencing repeated ill health

that leads to chronic ill health over time

because all the stressors are there every day

and that is the root of the matter

The way of dealing with that just now is by

covering it up

not addressing the real cause

suppressing it with drugs

and our society is going into a giant melt down and ultimately for the whole of humanity 

So what do you choose ?

Are you ready to face the facts 

You know what is getting you down 

You have all the answers 

You have the ability to turn the tides 

For yourself 

For your health 

For your wealth 

and ultimately for the whole of humanity

All the tools are here now 

All we have to do is be prepared to make the shift and become proactive in our way of living 

To be proactive

is to take responsibility

for our way of living 

all of it

and start to get off the hamster wheel 






and this does take time to reverse a familiar process

and it is wise to take small steps that are sustainable

and be gentle with ourselves and start to learn the codes of consciousness which allow us to 

Know Ourself 


Knowing ourself can start with knowing our energetic Signature

 which is our Astrology and Mayan Sign

as this reveals our life purpose and gives understanding of who we are

and why we came here

and how the current planetary movements are affecting our cosmic code

Starry Skies to the rescue

bringing us tough love truth 




This week has been a major script

in the Heavens Production Team


Saturday the 25th ~ Yellow Solar Sun day 

Mercury goes direct again so a very different vibe around communication

We are now in Scorpio Sun Code

which really ties in to what I have been saying about transformation of the ego if you look at the myth of it 


Below are some links of great blogs with information:

Darkstar Astrology

Darkstar Solar Eclipse

Blue Moon Astrology

and what I am sharing personally here

is from my weekly

Astrology group in Glastonbury

and the sharings of my host Carolina Lamus

Why not join us on Thursday evenings it is a lovely group ?

It has been a revelation for me this week

as it has brought a deep understanding of a long term cycle 

October 23rd ~ Solar Eclipse in Scorpio at 0 degrees approx 1030 pm in the UK

This was the last one for 19 years and the last one being 19 years ago on

October 24 1995 as they come in pairs

1995 was when my Son was born and a huge shift in how I saw the world , myself and everything as I became a Mother

His North Node is in Scorpio as is my Father’s

In the Mayan calendar this was Yellow Lunar Seed ~ a portal day which allows access to all time.

This is day 2 of the Blue Night Wavespell .

Blue Night is the code of being the conscious dreamer.

If you are a Blue Night this is the 13 day code of you .

This is the energetic signature

of being a free flowing human intuitive being

free from ego distortion and in balance with the

sacred feminine


Pic by Susan Seddon Boulet

To fully allow oneself to do this requires integrating the shadow to open up the portals.

The third eye is connected to The Sacral


 and  so it is essential that our relationship structures are in harmony

to let this free flowing channel come in our form free of our mind conditioned filters

this could be also seen as the Taurus ~ Scorpio axis

in either chakra and indeed in both as the wheel spins

As we let go of past nightmares we are free to be our true selves.

As part of this process we have to let go of our childhood coping mechanisms ~ our masks ~ so we can be true to our nature and reveal our seeded gift


Once the individual understands the nature of this process it becomes very self~evident

as to why one has to transform one’s early conditioned life in order to walk the soul path of the initiate 

So many people are suffering now

as they have followed an ego structure

that has done nothing to empower them 

or give any lasting support system 

because it cannot by it’s definition

It is a 

House of Cards


it is built on the foundational structures of sorrow and low self esteem 

seeking external gratification

which is not sustainable 

Just found a 3rd series of House of Cards is being filmed

which is such an eye opener to the world of politics and the egos of all those who live in this world of rule

Once you start to opt out of the money

and material way this is revealed 

and it is painful

because it brings all these old beliefs to the surface

so we can really see the truth

Some people choose not to and suffer even more because

they are still trying to play the game of life by the old rules 

and the old rules no longer apply 

New Game in play 

Becoming an adept at being an empowered learner is the key

and to do this starts at home 

by knowing oneself and one’s energetic belief system


It is actually a fantastic doorway

into the real world of our soul journey 

and is amazing 

but few choose it 

This eclipse also happened on October 23 1976

This was day 8 Yellow Galactic Sta

The day of integration in the initiating Wavespell of Red Dragon 

This is the start of the 260 day Wavespell

It was a red hot summer in the UK that year

so interesting to look back and check out what was significant for you and the world stage matrix 

World history October 1976

Thailand History 76

In particular it was a big shift for  my relationship with my partner and for him becoming a Father again.

Big issues have been resurfacing around our relationship and co operating with each other

and as I have mentioned before this is inherent in our Moons

My moon in Taurus and his Moon in Scorpio

These twin energies that are polar opposites

So we often lock horns 😉

More about the twin axis of  Signs here

Our patterns are polar opposites too ~ which is why we are so perfect for our learning journey

and why our relationship is incredibly tough and intense at times

this totally links in with the workshops I am doing at the moment

and as part of that

 focused energy coaching

 about our personal

Persephone Path


more about the axis here

My partner also has Venus in Scorpio ~ deep intense feelings

Being a

White Cosmic Dog


this is key to his soul journey

In his birth family of 11 siblings

it was a very tough creation space on all levels

One did not become a gentle


touchy feel person

in that environment

All space was over crowded

Limited resources

Strict and cruel authoritarian rules

Lots of anger and control issues

Like a war zone

This creates crisis coping mechanisms and code



and post traumatic stress syndrome



If you cannot feel safe in your family home

Where can you ?

The truth is we are all on this spectrum in some way

in different ways


We are all dealing with these issues now




In the Scorpio Gateway

Scorpio Solar Eclipse

The integration zone

No light only shadow in that time

Full strength integration energy

We are now in the 8th Gateway


The eighth sign of integration of the shadow

and it is so intense

nothing is surface in Scorpio

Living in Glastonbury is extreme



It is akin to a sandblast of the sahara

a constant solar storm

hitting you day in day out




at the meeting point of 52 energy lines

that connect the whole globe

It takes strength to see and feel your shadow every day

and hone your soul in the transformation of it

and most people do not do that

they hide under a mask instead

that is fully understandable of course


because the masks we all wear were crafted to let us live

survive in a heart hostile environment of our childhood

where most adults were doing the best they could

with their dna

their learned behaviour

with belief systems that had come handed down

generation after generation

and when we look at world history over the last 100 years

that has not been easy for the vast majority of human beings

If we look at the myths and horror stories of these times

we see weird and wonderful creatures

all of which get an outing shortly




And yet…

What is the “truth” of these creatures ?

My belief ~

they are simply shadow human archetypes

The parts of human beings that we are afraid to admit are in existence

and that potentially are each one of us

The terrible acts of inhumanity

that are all happening now

have always happened and the systems that allow this to happen….

remembering that we have to engage

with a system to give it power

The Vampyre ~


energy suckers  and systems

who are pretending to be something they are not

and glammer people

manipulate people with a trick or treat ~ risk or reward

Have us believe they are strong and we are weak yet who is feeding off who ?

Who is dependent ?

The Witch





Portrayed as ugly and demonic

Powerful and evil

yet feared

for their connection to source

and ability to evade manipulation

free of fear to a degree

beyond the majority

so untouchable through the usual channels

by those seeking to enslave 

truth tellers of the unpalatable 



The Ghosts




All our ancestry seeking redemption

Traces of the past still lingering

Still seeking salvation

Stuck somewhere

Unresolved emotional events

Trauma that is tenable

 there is no time …

and so the veil getting thinner

reveals past people’s patterns

seeking healing

looking for love and 

the light

Are you still doing the dance of Christmas Past ?

It is so difficult when children are involved to step off this obscene consumer spin story ~

who has the courage to …

and risk the child’s rejection and shadow ?

And face their shadow ~ in particular people pleasing and conformity … 

and yet like every other manipulation horror story of conditional love 

if we do not release ourselves from this material meme 

we cannot get off the karma wheel and be free of it

We are currently bound to this ritual in so many ways

and just like The Emperors’s New Clothes

what will it take before we 

Cut the ties that bind us ?


The Zombie 

The living dead

Walking wounded



Falling apart 


Repressed all deeper sensitive emotions 




Oblivious to anyone else on any deep level

Spirit has left the body 



Warm bodies

is a great film illustrating this metaphor



Great films and drama  I watched recently  that synchronise with this:

The Code

The Bridge 

Totally synchs with the Taurus ~ Scorpio axis code of course 🙂

Thank you to inspirational family and friends for recommending things to watch and read 

A very timely arrival from my friend Rebekah via her Yellow Human Friend Joe 

was a book


The Unfoldment by Neil Kramer

which I have listed on my Learning Library page on this blog

Gob smacking synchros and so many shared viewpoints and experiences

which is no surprise

as we entered planet earth

in a very close locality of the North West of England

Neil writes in a style that is easy to read, clear with no frills and cuts to the chase 

Love this book 

I have also added a pdf for Anastasia ~ the first of the Ringing Cedars series

Tip of the week

Big Hollywood film watch that I loved and is the key metaphor to this blog and my constant message 

Edge of tomorrow with Tom Cruise and Emily Blunt 

Whilst there are lots of subliminal messages in there and repeating patterns of war 

not to mention a huge amount of violence 

there is a very powerful wisdom code

embedded too 

which fits in with the Pallas Athena Asteroid of the Scorpio Eclipse and The Sun, Moon , Venus and Pallas Athena all being at maximum 0 degrees supercharged energy spectrum in close proximity which is a rare event 

Ego stimulant based films are amped up to reach the stirrings of the de sensitised 

and are therefore often very base and literal 

The theme is of death and immediate rebirth through literal death of the character

and the deeper meaning can be seen as

 reincarnation and the purpose of it 

which is learning how the universe works

what beliefs create what outcomes and what we have to do to match the outcome we want to create 

I believe that this is the opportunity

open to us now

for the first time in many a thousand year


so despite the woe in this thread there is a way out 🙂

and an adventure to be had in the process


During my still zone I have created lots of documents to assist people in this process 

I am co creating the most amazing process now with my clients in the

Persephone Path Workshop 

This process isn’t a quick fix

It isn’t the smaller picture 

It is the Divinity Code revealed 

and it comes through as part of using EFT with our shadow 

We have all the seeds of this transformation within us 

We do not have to die to be reborn

we work with what our mind perceives as the dark points of our life 

This is where the illumination begins 

On my Resources page

you can find new documents so you can start to trace your own codes

if you are ready 

You can see your soul journey 

You can see the web of wonder that you are part of 

Perfect timing for that as we are in Moon 4 

Self~Existing Moon 

which is all about our foundational structures that under pin everything 


time to start to turn everything around 

be powerful by taking power back

from when it was

lost or taken 





I will be creating additional support workshops

over the dark half of the year


self esteem


and  codes for

empowering conscious relationships 

please contact me if your interested and able to look at your shadow 


The Persephone Path Workshops  

have a few places left

as these are deep. intense and a lot of info is involved so please book in plenty of time so I can do your charts

The next one is in 2 weeks time on November 08 and is on day 10 of one of the most

intense periods of the whole wavespell cycle

The focus is our challenge and what we are seeking to be free of

to move into more flow and this is key to our relationships which are highlighted

in the 10 portal day code of :

Red Serpent Wavespell

Lots of exciting starry skies events coming too so will be talking about those 

please consider supporting this blog financially 

@£2 a month it will assist with my hosting and website costs and is very much appreciated

Thank you to the people who

have been generous and sent donations

Human Beings are the key to love and learning 


Blue Crystal Night~mare or dream?


Blue Crystal Night


Day 12 of

Yellow Human Wavespell



Please click on the links to take you to new places ~ other websites that expand on this 

Today we are in the land of dreams and nightmares. 

This energy is all about transformation ~ as it is a blue sign.

Blue Night Tribe

Today we are in waxing Cancer Moon

Today we are connecting to the Masculine in Aquarius and the new age that we are birthing in our masculine sun energy.

Cancer Moon is the sacred feminine of home, mothering and nurturing.



If you have a birthday today then this is your energy for the year that you are working with.

This means you are in year 12

of a thirteen year cycle. 

Complex stability

This year gives an opportunity to become crystal clear about this energy within you and how you choose to transform anything that gives rise to nightmares in your sleeping state ~ 

metaphors that reveal through feelings in dreams 

past issues seeking enlightenment by bringing them up to consciousness

stirring the soup and letting our deeper selves 

rise to the surface

so we can transform them and create energy and awareness 

to set us free from our past


go through the door and back to the garden 🙂



Are you ready to create a core within yourself

that creates stability ?



That is the only way you can create a stability of feeling about our ever changing world ~

at this particular time it is so changeable and it is happening quickly.

To survive the key way of being is flexibility ~ to be able to move with the white water rapids that are happening now

To be open to new learning and how to create change ~ each one of us knowing that ourselves and taking responsibility for it

letting go of any unhealthy dependencies as we shape our destiny with our own hands 

The first place to do this is within


Picture Alex Gray




I am sharing this with the intention of  illustrating where I am coming from in these posts and what has brought me to today.

Some of my journey in life so far has been very enjoyable and some has been very painful.

I have learnt from both areas

and most of my transition has come from the

not so enjoyable parts.

In our society this part is only just coming to

light now ~ at the perfect time.

We learn through our painful times of struggle and strife and that is the polarity framework on planet earth

When we accept that is how it is

and go with it

we see the silver lining

when we have done it enough

we reach a tipping pint and we transcend it

Most people still work purely with expanding their positive ~

why not this is so comfortable for the ego ?


we have very positive reinforcement for this in society 

There are a lot of positives about the ego and most people only understand what it is with a very limited reference point because

they haven’t done any in depth work

on themselves

this is the true meaning of karma and Code

When we start to do it

we are learning experientially through the process

this has a ripple effect

this is the law of attraction in action


Once we start to

be the code in everything we do

we access more and more of anything that is coded in that way


It really is simple when we look at it this way isn’t it ?

Eyes the window of the soul

I am speaking about this with the intention of  communicating awareness


each individual will read it

and give meaning to it

based on their belief systems

Many people have an intellectual understanding  of a concept and bandy it about in relationship with others 

however they have no understanding of how people actually learn  or have any experiential awareness of this and so it is simply skimming the surface

For example most people do not understand

that one of our key ways of learning is we


This link above explains this in detail

Albert Bandura’s development model 

In our families we model our role model’s which is one of the key reasons why we repeat familiar patterns even though some of these are abusive and seemingly very illogical 

Why model a behaviour that has hurt us such as sexual abuse, physical abuse or alcoholism ?

We do what we know that is why and we also make choices to learn or stay the same

Remember the saying

Do what I say not what I do

Did your parent’s ever say that to you ?

Did it work ?

Chances are you copied their behaviour in many respects and if you personally didn’t you will attract someone into your life that did ?

Can you spot them?

This is why when baby animals are brought into captivity from the wild  ~ such as Rhinos they are put with other grazing animals so they can model them and learn how to be a grazing animal. This can be a sheep for the purpose of modelling grazing, in the absence of a Rhino adult, according to a documentary I watched.

If someone has never experienced receiving respect they do not know how to do the behaviour respect and unless they are taught it and give and receive it

they cannot be it

To go a level deeper 

If a person has had events where they were

disrespected in their life 

until they heal that and how they felt 

and are still feeling on a deep level of consciousness

then pattern matches of these events will keep showing up because

that is their holographic signature

and they show up so healing and new learning can begin


Now the ego doesn’t like this because it cannot control it

Often a person creates ego strategies to try and control it and these develop in childhood and become more complex over time

behavioural for example ~ be passive, be aggressive, get a lot of wealth to avoid it, be clever, start a religious war etc

Every person on planet earth has an ego

that is our shared humanity

and each ego is either in it’s raw state and acting without consciousness

or in process of raising consciousness through self awareness….

because that individual has no awareness of ego and how it works

or has awareness of that intellectually but hasn’t done anything energetically or emotionally to transform their personal

emotional triggers

My video here

and there is nothing “wrong” with any of those places of being

It is what makes the world go round

it is what it is

It is our emotional evolution

Education is very important for raising



at the moment most education of young people on planet earth is focusing on the world around them with the intention of  “gainful employment”

There is very little education about the child themselves and how they become self aware

even about practical matters such as how to cope with life generally

that is of no interest to the ego model of consumerism ~ self awareness is not wanted because self aware people do not comply with it

If a child doesn’t want to learn from this model then they are seen as a problem and attempts made to make them comply and in the UK this hasn’t changed in 40 years ~ I have experiential knowledge of that as I have worked with young people and these systems and learned a lot from them

The people who are teachers often do not have any self awareness either so….

this  creates a pattern 

Generally many inspiring teachers who are coming from an integrated and knowing place 

leave the system because it is not the same code

It is impossible for them to be there 

Most of the codes in today’s schools are about compliance and becoming a product of the consumer machine

Judgement is a part of that

Being judged and labelled and whipped into shape 

Discernment is another code entirely and if people are stuck in the code of Judgement then they often haven’t accessed discernment with intellectually or experientially 🙂

If someone has been on the receiving end of judging….


there is code there about that

To Judge someone subjectively means to label them into one of two areas of polarity



to place a meaning about someone’s behaviour

and if you have escaped that learning you are a rare being indeed

because this is endemic and systemic in our world today

and a very 

favoured sorting tool of the ego so it knows what is good and bad for it

It is a very immature and basic sorting mechanism that keeps the ego feeling it is acting in safe mode and living in a righteous way 

which is very subjective to that individual’s experience of what they believe is “right” and “wrong” according to  their modelling

often this is simply taking on their family, friends and society’s beliefs without any questioning or deeper processing ~ no conscious exploration and blind acceptance

It also has a pathological code as well ~ to strip someone of their ability to be self reliant and stand up to bullying and is often used in that way to undermine an individual that isn’t being compliant and to create genocide as seemingly a righteous solution to people who have sufficient fear 

no reasoning

no common sense

no love

no compassion

no sense of true self happening only ego borrowing from other people to create itself

When this is a way of being ~ someone’s complex structure

the sense of self comes from outside and is validated by the outside

world in an eye

Everything in undeveloped and untrained ego structure is affected by the outside world

and often the

person feels

at everything and everyone’s mercy

and this is therefore their reality

Life happens to them

they are in a victim code of feeling disempowered

because that is the truth of their internal structure

When our ego  ~ our human being ness ~ is externally referenced then

everything external is seen as the source of all joy and pain

When the truth is

we can change this when we train and transform our ego 

focus on what is feeling painful

our triggers

and instead of wanting to annihilate them , control them, blame them

we focus on our inner source and restructure it

Our feelings then become our guide to our dream

instead of suppressing them and repressing them 

using escape and coping mechanisms such as alcohol, drugs, workshops, sex, nicotine, sugar, workouts

we go to our core and find out what messages our feelings want to share

about our life journey so far and what we have come here for

our soul journey

all of this is connected and is the ancient process


When we reach middle age to use a computer analogy

our hard drive becomes full

and initiates

mid life crisis

just like on planet earth

we are full of all these old patterns of  the opposite of right relationship

our planetary cup is full

especially in Somerset where I live ~ there are floods everywhere

the boundaries have become eroded


Each one of us can empty our cache now and in our own cleansing

cleanse the world

Certain energetic codes really resist showing

emotion and working with it

These are revealed in the Zodiac 

People who have had big emotional traumas and choose to stuff down their emotions

put a brace face on it

and stay strong

are using a coping mechanism of the ego that does not create healing

It is the antithesis of healing

the anti christ if you will in terms of christ consciousness

and by christ consciousness I mean a way of relating that is coming from

ego transformation that is love and understanding in truth


 having transformed all our wounding  events

so that we have a natural place of love and compassion

yellow human

Picture Alex Gray 

When new learning comes along that doesn’t fit our ego’s map of the world ~

it’s understanding and belief system

we often get a map clash

and if that ego isn’t willing to be open to new ideas it will use it’s favourite coping mechanism which is


here is a great video about 911 to illustrate this point

It is with reference to that event and explains the meaning of denial generally

Our ego is the soul seed of our evolution

and is a powerhouse of potential

When you have been on the receiving end of narcissistic rage you feel the force


unfortunately when this place of darkness and

code of not feeling

or not expressing feelings of the shadow

is reached

there is little hope of it happening because

a narcissist will not look at their own ego experiences of hurt

and rarely seeks any help because they do not believe there is anything unhealthy about them

often these experiences are found in childhood

and are never resolved because of the belief that everyone else has the problem

and the only way to transmute all this pain is to scapegoat someone else

and turn them into the focus

they are the bad ones

This code of blame is part of the victim pattern

and is part of the  human spectrum of emotional evolution

In families we have people who play different roles and wear masks to form a holographic picture

Instead of each person being whole and integrated with their own well rounded healthy ego and persona

It isn’t anyone’s fault

It is how our western society has evolved so that we can evolve

The first step is to recognise that

and that is difficult for many people trapped in victimhood

because to do that takes courage

and taking responsibility for our own feelings 

that we choose how we feel every time

we choose how we behave every time

Emotional Intelligence is a key part of this way of being



In a family that has alcoholism for example.

There will be a learned behaviour about alcohol

and as I was growing up 

most people didn’t even recognise it is a drug

Because it is legal ~ and cannabis isn’t

a generalisation can be made that because alcohol is legal it is ok, it is safe

That again is coming from immature ego

alcohol is legal because of many reasons and nothing to do with it being safe 

Lots of agendas around alcohol

and how we choose to relate to it is 

our choice

As a young person, me and most of my peers learned that to have recreation time meant getting drunk 

getting legless in fact

Lots of media at that time showed people relaxing with alcohol and cigarettes

When you had a “bad” day at the office ~ get drunk

Drink at lunchtime

Party at weekend

What has changed on mainstream media today ?

It was socially acceptable

My guess is that today in the UK

there is a very high percentage of the

population who use the coping mechanism of

alcohol to get through their day to day

to” relax “

and that they cannot do without it and yet do not see themselves as “addicted”

and most people cannot have one drink and stop

or one cigarette and stop

or heroin now and again

or a soap opera once a month

or one crisp

one piece of chocolate

This is wired in to our amygdala as a way to feel good

We all have our own coping mechanisms that we have become addicted to

and most people do not see that

some addictions have more harmful side effects than others

they help us to cope with relationships

that are not honest,


or truly loving

and as that is the basis of our society

living from untrained ego

out of balance

living an artificial life

and having to be dishonest in every way

as a result


In virtually every family there is someone high on the narcissist spectrum ~

doesn’t want to feel to heal 

To counteract this there is an enabler

The scapegoat who can be blamed and held responsible for the source of the narcissist’s pain and enables them to stay unconscious

There is often a whole family tree history on this

If you have interacted with someone who has a lot of anger and is high on the spectrum of narcissism 

and you have done something to highlight their true lack of control 

pull the rug on this dishonest way of living

they will seek to destroy you

If you have been or are in this situation this is a great source of information about it

Be mindful of how you connect and perhaps minimising your exposure to small chunks

Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

When this first starts it may be physical bullying 

this happened to me at school when I stood up to someone bullying someone else

this created a whole pattern over my lifetime

in all areas of my life especially the corporate world

Following the cosmic cookie trail of co dependency and bullying

and I have been tapping on this today again ~ I use emotional freedom technique because it works for me

Since becoming a therapist I have encountered many narcissists as clients or clients family as that is my attraction

One of my first client’s in fact led me to discover what the term was because I knew that something dishonest was going on in our sessions and I couldn’t put my finger on it so I went on a whole journey of research

this is the gift of learning this energy can bring

at first I found it very challenging and it triggered lots of fear responses in me and revealed confidence issues and lack of self~ belief

I was in a relationship in my 20’s with a narcissist and I became very ill on a physical and mental level

When I was drunk the part of me I repressed when sober came out and I spoke the truth

and  paid the price on all levels

Instead of learning how to create healthy relationships I simply looked for addictive fixes

alcohol and drugs to escape and relax

let go of being shy

sex to feel valuable, worthy and loved 

When I was “sober” and single I felt the truth of what I did when I became this suppressed persona

and I was always suppressing and trying to be “perfect” 

be a people pleaser

to please

be what the narcissist wanted me to be

and of course this narcissist energy was also in me

How I really felt came out at the office parties to my boss

who was behaving inappropriately as my boss ~ his true self emerging

when my bullying boyfriend fought with his friend

when my friends were absent emotionally and I could be honest about how I felt

It wasn’t nice of course

you know the story because you have one too 🙂

When we are repressing our true nature somewhere it has to come out somewhere else to balance itself

this is the bi-polar pattern

swings and roundabouts

This scenario keeps playing out throughout our life until we decide to do something about it.


Take away the rose tinted glasses

the vino

the trip to la la land

and look at how we are creating our reality from all these parts

how our family parts are pulling at our heart strings

and breaking away from these roles

Taking off the mask



The Narcissist is a great teacher because through our interaction we can really see our complex stability in action


When someone is acting without consciousness because they have been triggered we may be on the receiving end of the sum total of their rage ~

years of events of uncleared emotion that is in full throttle and the sum total all channeled

at you

the trigger

There is no way to bring consciousness as they are not conscious

Nothing you can do or say can unlock their spell 

You can say it anyway if you choose and it may add fuel to the fire

It is like being a child again with an angry adult who has all the answers of unreason

and all the power 

and yes I have been there with my children in this role


whatever we say to an unconscious rager

 they will only see their meaning

It can feel very disempowering and upsetting

when someone wants to hold you responsible and destroy you

for something you didn’t do

and give you their guilt trip instead of feeling it and dealing with it

and the more we do our journey and work on our self~belief and self ~ esteem 

and all our bullying and narc encounters

the more we can be present


let go of our fear

and let go of taking on this other person’s attempt to create the Scapegoat in us

because we no longer hold the code for that

When I am in the presence of this relationship most of the coping mechanisms I have created 

cannot be used 

intelligence, reasoning and honesty 

no dice

this person wants to hurt me because I have removed a veil

a curtain has been drawn back

without their consent

light coming in

At the moment I do not feel compassion for them ~ that may change over time

with more layers in my journey

At the moment I know that their way of being is not love

and so I do not match it with love

I know this pattern in history has created terrible things and is doing so now

“it’s just business”


I want no part of it

No matter how many times I have to face the narcissist

I will

and I will not give way to them

and their distortion

born from living a lie

It is what we are here to create

right relations

and learn how to create our dream from the inside out

letting go of our nightmares by following

simple moral codes

that aren’t rocket science

and yet build amazing light structures

from the stars

of the heart


If you would like to experience how EFT works for you

Please get in touch

I offer a free consultation

You can work on what you wish to create 

and let go of your past creations 

and this creates a different code

You create the code

You have the answers 

You are the dreamer in the dream

Everything that has ever happened to you can be a part of that way of being

Taking our power back involves taking responsibility 

for our choices in life

That was then

This is now

What are we choosing

Now ?

Jo in Glastonbury

Love to your emotional evolution 

and ours




Solar Heart Power



Yellow Solar Sun Day

Please click on the links to take you to other websites and expand the language of light that is intended with this blog

As always I create these blogs that are so much more than the personality of me 🙂

This universal dance we are in affects all of humanity and this is completing today in day 9 of 

Yellow Human Wavespell

Just a reminder that we are counting down to the last few days of the

White Castle of refinement and revelation

in the Mayan Wavespell

and all heaven and hell let loose as we go for the burn in

The Blue Castle of fire

this begins on the 12th of February

52 days of transformation


one of the biggest energetic signatures of the 260 day cycle that started on the day of death ~ Hallow’een 

Ten portal days to transient Time and see the code with

Red Serpent Wavespell


Which is all about loving the skin we are in and letting the kundalini serpent rise

transforming how we relate first and foremost to ourself ~ our ego and higher self and who is running our relationship code at this time


who is driving our bus ?

our angry inner child looking for oblivion to escape from day to day life ?

the transformed mature personality who has alchemically been enlightened through a process

that allows it to know itself

see the patterns

see the journey

and “get it” 

get that it has created the whole experience to know itself and when at last it does

it knows it has a choice and it makes the choice that serves the whole universe 🙂

and has a sense of humour 😉

In this continuing snake spiral our evolving self is like a smorgasbord

with bits of personality popping up here and there like a misshapen cartoon 

a wonky spell off Harry Potter

and sometimes we may look and appear bedraggled 

as we pull ourselves into an integrated shape


Maybe you have encountered a Gorgon or two on your travels ?

Maybe they are still insisting that you….



game ????

Are you willing to still

sell your soul ?

Are you willing to say

hell no

not this time  🙂

This is the time of Gorgon Test and as we start to  shed our winter coat 

and rub the slumber from our eyes

a remembrance that this is a purification time in the Northern Hemisphere

out of the darkness and preparing for the light quickening and returning

Dark deeds are afoot in our world with worldy agendas that we may be unaware of

that don’t even enter our head because we are not she of the dastardly plan

the machiavellian method

the black art of evil 

which I say with a wicked chuckle and a glint in my eye

Evil is simply the polar opposite of live

It is the code of entropy and death


I am keeping the vibe as light as I can and I mean no disrespect or dishonour to anyone at the hands of  these energies and strategies  who are suffering because of it

Hugs to you if you are having a difficult time


believe me when I say that I feel deeply for all of life on planet earth

the intention of this blog is to share as much light as I can at this waxing moon

and to share solutions and information if I can

to those ready to hear

and ready to act on it

I do what I can as a simple woman

as a human being

and a flawed one at that

Living a death structure is what happens when people ignore the very basic codes of light that have been present in word and faith structures for thousands of years

We are all doing the “best’ we can and sometimes that is an extremely sh*t best

Doesn’t matter whether we are educated, rich, poor , old, young. ugly or beautiful in whoever’s eyes

world in an eye

the truth is

we all make choices that do not serve us or the wider world

because we do what we know

and that is where most of humanity is just now 

acting from a place of not knowing and dependent on a system that has a plan 

and that plan isn’t a happiness and health plan for the majority

that code does not make money for the corporates

We buy to feel happy

We get sick because we are not happy and live in a sick society

Money is our God

and people count for….

what exactly ?

What do you see in your neighbourhood that is a framework that loves and values people ?

It is pointless to judge people’s behaviour because of that great leveller

and the more we go through the process the more we realise how pointless it is

we let go of it

because we know it is all part of the code

that gets us to see ourselves and know how the universal code works

In a nutshell that is what it is all about 🙂

The code


I am intending to share bite size chunks with you as I do not have the time to devote to sharing this as I have to make a living

If I could I would spend more time and this is the conundrum we all share just now

How to keep home and hearth together and live with integrity 🙂

How to live our dream and get ourselves out of this corporate net that is strangling our communities

These plans are coming thicker and faster and it is truly shocking…

however when you come to know thyself you realise the ego has no mercy

no compassion

it is a killing machine

and left to it’s own devices it has always been a ruthless and unmerciful warrior that can always qualify it’s murderous actions 

Look to history and see what atrocities have been committed in the name of our Creator

Remember that the only way an ego can know itself is through the reflections of others telling it who it is and validating it’s existence

Once we start to transform our ego and our shadow

our ego starts to do this less and less because….

we know ourselves from the heart process 

When doubt about ourself shows up ~ there is more inner process opportunity available 🙂

I have no religion and never have to be

absolutely clear on that matter

I am attempting to explain what I have learned using words and words are 

limited and subjective 

and as much as I intend to communicate clearly

I am me and you are you

and you will see and interpret this with your code and understanding 🙂

Just this simple understanding can bring an amazing awareness for people who are struggling to

relate and create a way of living from difference and respect

I have been reading lots of books about code over the past few weeks and this is input into my energetic field

creates a cauldron of creativity 


Anything that comes out of my mouth is a cosmic blend of all

with my filter 

Just like whatever comes out of a computer has had to go in ~ be inputted by a human being and so there is always a

ghost in the machine as a result 🙂

“I” don’t take credit for anything as I know

that all that has ever been or will be 

is what I access 

and I blend it into my own smoothie recipe is all


I do not intend to diminish my personality

or elevate it

I love the fact that I am a number nine and that this is what I am here for and….

yea I finally get myself

well sort of 

I accept my weirdness and celebrate it.

The Code for living in love is simple

and so you may be disappointed to hear

If listening with an egoic untrained ear 🙂

that this code has been around in plain sight and spoken of

in places of religion

for a very long time

It has got lost in translation for many

and sometimes the people who have shared it have done that on purpose…..

what a surprise 

If you are open to truth

you may be cosmically ecstatic like I was

when the lightbulb moment occurred and 

I had an epiphany moment.

I am so glad that I kept going with the work I feel passionate about 

even though so many times I could have given up because so many people would rather die


than take responsibility for their life and beliefs and 

instead of being open to new ways of living

and heart opening emotional therapies

rather than saying they are afraid of what they don’t know

they would rather crucify you and your beliefs

Yes it’s an age old story and now….

now at last the light is returning after being so deeply lost in the wilderness of patriarchy we are all coming to an awakening point

The Code for living in sustainability

in truth

in honesty

in harmony

in joy……

Drum Roll

Is written in the ten commandments 



It really is that simple in one sense

because the truth is always really simple

When we live in a way that is in total alignment

with love 

and that means upholding a truthful and

honest relationship with everyone and


what is created by that code of living

that code of conduct

has no conflict

and when we live without conflict

we live in joy

I have lots more to share about what I found on my journey through these books and how to use these codes to unlock the secrets within us

and will be sharing them here as and when I can

and in the events I am creating this year

The time has come for us to complete these circles and cycles

learn from them

know the true meaning of karma is the code

Do this

Get that

and realise how simple it is to see how we have created something 


our beliefs

our thoughts

our actions

and most importantly to let go of being led by our head

to let our heart 

guide us

with our emotions 

to bring ourselves back to the garden


Are you ready to reveal your Heart Code

Unfurl your wings

see your code

unplug from the ego matrix

align direct to source

and power up ?

There is a Cosmic Code that we receive and

this is what is unfolding ~ this is the Universal

Programme that is beaming down for our new


We each have a personal code 

When we decide to switch on and become pro active and listen to our heart

we are initiated


When we start to work with our ego we

know ourselves from the inside out

the veils drop from our eyes

we start to see things differently

when we work with this transformation process every day

what we focus on 


when we focus on opening our heart

we let our higher self in

and we allow our code to reconnect to the Christ Consciousness

we switch on our illumination process

this is our free will

When we decide to get our free will to go for our heart’s desire

our universal players come and play

show us how

we let go of the old

 we create the new….

the redemption song

Be the shining light in your community and sing out your voice to the heavens

Sing of what is true and shiny bright light

to shatter distortion and corruption

with your resonance

our co dependent way of life has seen our resources diminish so that we are reliant on 

structures and support systems that

do not care

do not love

are the anti thesis of right relationships

and self ~ empowerment

and now it is time

to reclaim our land

and our beautiful earth space

one person at a time

doing their reclaim 

calling their spirit in

Sagittarius ~ The Horse energy 

is so much more……

it is the place where star’s are created literally

and we are of the stars

we have the same structure

the same holographic code

and the ability to create new codes

that reflect our times

Woo Hoo 


Up an Coming sharing light events

Please click on the links for more info:

Shine Love Magnet Friday 15 February in Somerset

Shine 12 February in Hampshire

Shine 15 February in Yorkshire

and if you haven’t got one near you why not create one and connect to us ?

I have also got an Art of Alchemy with EFT  Weekend  in Somerset on 01 March ~ you can take part wherever you are in the world if you wish to use Skype

Come and learn more tools for your journey that work with code

More info here

and coming soon more info about the big 9 year heading our way and what it means….

Red Solar Moon Year 

I am doing a retreat in the heart chakra of the world

and the Glastonbury Zodiac

Come and connect and let’s weave some magic

If you want to work one to one with me please get in touch 

Cosmic Seed


Cosmic Seed Day ❤

Wow what an amazing journey time 🙂

How are you feeling after experiencing this powerful energy wavespell ~ Yellow Human ? 

Our humanity , our personality, our personal mini planet spaceship body ~ that is taking us on a journey of discovering our capacity to love by listening to our ego, our shadow, that reveals itself through inner self talk, inner critic and this is felt in emotions of the fear spectrum and made manifest in our body ~ in form ~ when we do not heed it ❤

It has been a revelatory 13 days for me with so much emotion coming to the surface and as I feel it and release it ~ I go into more compassion and understanding and forgiveness. As I enter this space of real truth ~ that is no longer distorted by my emotional minds belief of wounding ~ I can see a different picture and feel my heart open ~ and allow more wisdom ~ more light ~ to be received.


The miracle of working with the Mayan wavespell is recognising the calling of it 🙂

One of my close friends has just received this calling and we laughed at the way it is bringing so much awareness for her and suddenly all the writing and information suddenly takes on a deeper meaning like finding out the formula for invisible ink ~

what was hidden from sight is breathtakingly revealed with so much clarity 🙂

It is the calling of our soul ❤

It is the calling of the sacred feminine ❤

It is the revealing of the heart path secrets ❤

When we are ready to walk the heart path we align with this great mystery…… and as we allow ourselves to have the courage to face our shadow and work with it ~
instead of avoiding it and avoiding our greatest fears about ourselves and our lives so far……….

We step off the ego path of seeking to be loved, heard and validated outside of ourselves ……

When we set this intention and make this commitment to know ourselves…..

Instead of hiding and continuing with what we have been taught since children ~ that we have to work with a false sense of self and living that is out of alignment with who we really are ~

this is when the magic happens ❤ ❤ ❤
We have been sold a lie ~ an illusion ~ that we have allowed ~ it is all part of our journey of awakening ❤
Last night I had a dream ~ that I was in a darkened place and it was very old. It was built of stone and very cold. People were in that place and I could feel them coming towards me .

I could feel who they were more than see who they were ~ I did not need to identify their faces ~ my heart knew. Who they were ~ their personality ~ did not matter any more ~ I recognised their pulse, their energy wave, their pattern.

I grew colder and colder ~ and awoke with a shiver ~ I was physically cold and felt fear.

My aha moment of that process……

There is no linear time ~

We are connecting to everything that has ever happened, will happen to us ~

Now 🙂

As we change our story from the past ~ everything changes.

We connect to all that is in this level of consciousness of sleep ~ this is dreamtime ~ where we access our energetic record and we can focus on it because all other stimuli is dimmed.
It is a clarity possibility.

As is our journey through life ~ we experience different levels of consciousness and when we are ready to raise that consciousness

We move into a whole new world of communication with our totality ~ all of ourself ❤

This is the Aquarius time we are transiting into.
Aquarius’s planet is Uranus 🙂 We are experiencing powerful transits in Uranus and Pluto’s square dance

When we are physically asleep in our bed and at deep levels of conscious dreaming we still have bodily requirements ~ everything is happening beneath our mind awareness because otherwise our mind would be overwhelmed by the billion activities required to keep our body starship cruising ❤
What we call automatic roles such as breathing, heart rate, hormones and so on ~ they are governed by a consciousness that many of us do not have awareness of consciously ~ consciousness trained yogis do and can consciously change heart rates.

We all do that with our thoughts and beliefs ~ most of us aren’t aware of that ~ this is growing on our planet now ❤

It is time ❤

Many people are still believing that their ego has the power to influence how their path unfolds….. as though it is a separate entity ~ that they are a separate entity and somehow in control of their path ~

This perspective is limited and still in a world of duality thinking because there is still energetic cargo on board their spaceship that hasn’t been unpacked and explored ❤

We are all interconnected ~ we are all mini planet spaceships and each of us has a shared bigger picture playground ~ this is universally accessed and our common ground 🙂

The sacred thread that binds us all.

Each mini planet spaceship that we are is a combination of stardust literally

We all have stardust , star seed, energetic circuitry and this is encoded in our dna.

Each mini planet spaceship of humanity has a different belief about the world and it’s role within it and so it attracts and creates it’s day to day reality by projecting it outside of itself ~ inner slides being shown.
This is the billion universes operating now ❤
As with the levels of consciousness governing our personal spaceship routine operations ~ we have to have focus and filters so we can see where we are going and what we are doing……

this is the personal plan and our personality ❤

our conscious universal playground also has a plan and this course is plotted in a bigger picture way ❤

This is the tantra pattern 🙂

This is the paradox ~ we are the most important focus for ourselves if we wish to be here in this universal playground and firing on all cylinders

Sometimes we don’t fire on all cylinders because we don’t believe and trust in ourselves and we lose sight of our mission in this life ~ to be our gift and be creative in our true star seed nature ❤

At the same time we are always being guided, being held , loved and supported.

The bigger picture of our evolving groovy universe is the most important focus for the universe that we are part of 🙂

Allowing this co creative process is the key ❤ Unleashing our heart wisdom involves balancing the two forces within us ~ this is the sacred geometry pattern.

The triangle coming down ~ the harmonious trinity of sun masculine energy, language of light, the heavens , the planets, the feminine energy of the moon, the cycle patterns, the spiral and so much more……
The triangle going up ~ the harmonious trinity of all earthly form masculine and feminine creating the divine child within us ~ earth, our humanity, our body, our core and so much more ❤

Every experience allows us to learn 🙂
If we allow it 🙂
The more we allow ourselves to be honest about ourselves and let go of people pleasing and the more honest we become…..

the more honest we become the more we let go of dishonest patterns that are distorted and fragmented and go round and round the houses and reduce direct clear channels to source and as a part of that process the Brucie bonus is…..
our core energy powers up ❤ Woo Hoo ❤

Last night….

When my body became cold , my consciousness was raised to awakening so that I could adjust my environment and create a space that supported it feeling good. Often in dreams that comes from a dream being fearful ~ a nightmare at extremis …..

This is our guide that alerts us to new ways of being ❤

We awaken to make some adjustment is all

Our fear and anger spectrum emotions raise our awareness…..
to course corrections ……..

and when we go through these black holes we raise our vibe.

There are many things that come together in this process.

Our emotions lead the way and this is the emotional evolution ❤

When we feel something that isn’t love or joy we are simply experiencing information about something outside of ourselves that has happened before or that hasn’t happened before and we have no inner sat nav for ❤

This feeling is a sacred thread that leads us to new ways of being ……
If we allow it ❤
When we let go of this feeling by following it back to some event in our past ……..

We change how we feel about this event in the past and….

as a result our mind perceives whatever was in that event, differently

This allows new behaviour, new beliefs and creating new habits ~ a new cosmic groove

and when we change our cosmic groove ~ our energy bubble ~ everything that is connected to that ~ which is everything 🙂 ~ changes ❤

There is only love ~ if our mind is still full of duality events and beliefs that perceive love as fractured ~ love and fear as opposites ~ that is true in that experience…….has to be because that is universal experiential energetic law 🙂
Our shadow is simply aspects of ourselves that are seeking integration and in that process of bringing them in we create new learning.

Any parts that feel separate come back to the core and are no longer an energy drain 🙂
As a result our mind becomes more aligned and focused ❤

This is all perfectly aligned at the perfect time and there is no wrong choice ❤
When you use the Mayan Wavespell as a tool to help you see this pattern in your own life it is literally mindblowing and you see your innate sacredness as part of all that is ~ this is experiential knowing of the oneness that people perceive as an intellectual abstract ~ which is a world apart from the actuality of knowing through experiencing ❤

When we take responsibility for all of our life experience as a choice ~ most of it may not have been conscious 🙂 ~ we liberate ourselves and start this amazing experience in a different gear ❤

This Mayan energy today is a sacred thread to the new year coming on July 26 Yellow Galactic Seed.

Only when we are ready to look into our darkness do we allow more light and in that process connect with the true secrets of our magical universal process.
We empty our cup emotionally and energetically so it is ready to receive ❤
Heart path ❤

It’s a love thing ❤
Self love thing on a practical, experiential, life mastery through walking the path and facing the challenges.

Knowing a person by what their feet do as well as their mouth.

Big serpent energy wave starts tomorrow ~ loving the skin we are in ❤
Ten portals for super energised potentiality to birth our sacred feminine and raise our awareness of our intuitive, feeling, surrendering, trusting, nurturing potentiality and letting go of being led by our ego head.

We can create new patterns now that are ego free ……

When you start to look with great awareness at your pattern you will see amazing miracles and the veil is lifted ~ anything and everything is on purpose and related. It is important now that we trust in our heart’s desire and do what we love to do knowing we are creating a new pattern for ourselves.

This pattern will become more refined each year that passes and we will add to it energetically.

When I first started doing workshops I would go and do them even for one person ~ the most important part of this is simply the creative process ~ our own personal evolution trip and understanding of how we create ~ recognising our own level of integrity, commitment and what really resonates with our heart is the most valuable of understanding ~ it is priceless.

When we do what is really true for us it doesn’t matter who shows up to our show ~ because we are doing it for ourselves first and foremost and anything else is additional ~

as we grow and learn through each waxing and waning cycle we slough off any surplus mind methodology that are slowing us down and we enter into the new way of being ~ it is like a test if you will ~ a test to see if we let our dream light go out or if we have the faith to keep going and turn up the volume of our innate wisdom

all patterns reveal sacred geometry

it is simple to observe

a debt pattern of more going out than coming in simply shows that ~ without any judgement  🙂

money lets us hide and make things happen that are ego led ~ when our money is limited it hones our blade ~ we cut back to the bare bones and see our structure, we can become more decisive, disciplined and build our stamina , heighten our ability to see deeply and in that area of restriction we can become very aware of what is heart pattern and what is addiction, avoidance, excess padding and protection from our wild child  that seeks to be freed from tight seed husks and scatter freely in the wind to be carried to the fertile places that support new growth……

marches for gmt free is a wonderful way forward and important ~
that will holistically happen when ….

we do inner work on our inner slides ~

remembering that everything is in our world now because it matches the collective unconscious beliefs and is a necessary part of our evolution 🙂
It is an inner shift for all of us ❤
When we look within at what gave rise to these models in our world within each of us and share that…..
new models are birthed 🙂
What we are being, doing, having is affecting everything ❤

When we heal old wounds, we heal old patterns energetically and we do not stay stuck on the karma wheel of everything that has happened so far.

It is a many splendoured thing much like the Mayan Calendar ~ same pattern 🙂

If you feel called to co create in this process with me ~ maybe a one to one, you wish to know your Mayan sign, what year you are on in your 13 year spiral, letting go of some past patterns so you can birth the new…..
Please get in touch ~ I offer a free consultation and I love this work

You are another me and we connect because we are meant to 🙂
Everything we do together creates a change in everything ❤

I will be creating a workshop in this period ~ will let you know tomorrow when we are in the spiral and I can tune in.

Love to you and your seed of creativity ❤ ❤ ❤
Be yourself
Know yourself
Honour yourself

It is time 🙂

On my cookie trail today I looked for an image to go with my blog. This is always amazing for me.

This beautiful picture is one of many created by this artist who ~ synchronistically of course ~ just happens to be sharing lots of stuff around the Mayan

He is Leigh J McCloskey and here is one of his videos

If you are a regular reader of my blog you will know that I learn so much from the films I watch with my family each week which are always so inspiring.

Argo ~ a film about rescue and with some amazing links to a favourite of mine ~ Jason and the Argonauts ~ with a different twist. One of the most poignant moments for me in the film, is by Alan Arkin ,who I love ~ amazing actor. He speaks of being a coal miner who leaves his work to rejoin his family ~ and yet can never wash off the residue of the coal and be free of it ~ something I am becoming very aware of in my own life and how I wish to relate. If I do not wish to experience a way of behaving then it is essential that I ensure it isn’t within me ~ either from past experiences that created trauma, or how I behave ~ and no excuses 🙂

If I don’t like it ~ don’t do it ~ very much a work in progress.

I was struck by the history again ~ how the West has used the East as a commodity and is surprised when that doesn’t sit well with people ~ astonishing to me that people ever think it is ok to behave in that way and how in many respects ~ nothing has changed in our world today ~ it seems really simple to me that this isn’t a way to relate  ~ yet it is the way of our world way of being~ pure madness.

Like so many American rescue stories in the movies ~ the irony of a few people being rescued and yet every day thousands dying for greed. Beyond understanding or rationality.

Looper ~ a violent film with impact and for me gut wrenching in it’s theme of time travel. It really illustrates what I am talking about in this blog ~ through time travel with a characters involved in a story that have a different perspective because they come from a different time ~ and so can see the ripples that go out and create reality. I would love to see more films that don’t need to have such a high level of violence to get the point across . Without revealing too much of the plot this really highlights how narcissists are created as children and something that is very close to my heart ~ creating loving patterns for our children by learning from our childhood experiences.

If we all do our own loop by going back in time using EFT ~ emotional freedom technique ~ we change who we are today.

I also eventually bought the film She ~ and wow saw so many fear patterns created with this film ~ it had a very big impact on me as a child and to watch it now revealed so many aha moments. If you feel emotional intensity when watching any film then this is a wonderful way of looking for pattern matches that you can let go of.

It reminded me very much of The Mummy series ~ and highlights past lives and reincarnation .


One of the things I always remind my clients of is that we often put an adult understanding on a childhood experience ~ that isn’t how a child experienced that event. I used to hide behind the settee for Dr Who and when I went to Disney World I had to leave part way through many of the child suitable 3 d experiences 🙂 I struggle with anything 3D as I am very sensitive in that respect and do not need to have such a full on experience. I guess many people are so desensitized to cope with their lives, that they need this pumped up entertainment to actually feel anything.

I will be writing another blog about the Red Serpent tomorrow and so for now wish you farewell ……

I will leave you with the dream meditation we did on the EFT Circle on Saturday with the full moon workshop.

Maybe it will reveal some magic for you 🙂


The insight I got from this was an experience in Paleochora in Crete of a deep inner connection and bliss moment ~ which probably occurred around this time in 1986 🙂

The feel good factors

I was alone on a beach and the sun was warm. Soft sand supporting my body. I could see the sea and the mountains. I didn’t feel a need for anyone. I was so glad I had faced my fear and overcome it to leave my job in the UK and go. I had felt the calling and allowed it. I was listening to Brothers in Arms by Dire Straits and I loved the guitar.

The key insight ~ I loved being in Greece because there were few English people there and so it wasn’t the language commonly spoken and so I had a choice for many months ~ before I got any understanding ~ of whether to tune in or not. I didn’t utomatically get pulled in to other people’s worlds through overhearing their conversation. I was separate, oblivious and often without any understanding of others.It enhanced my experience.

Most of the people who were there in my circle were fellow adventurers . We didn’t have to spend most of our time talking. We shared our heart space. We had fun and we partied under the stars to soulful music ~ the Doors, Rolling Stones,Scorpions ,Santana and the Doobie brothers……classic albums. We danced, we were in our bodies, we were to use Jim Morrison’s words …….

immaculate 🙂

Yesterday I danced to this song at The Blues Jam in Glastonbury ~ love it

I was feeling the same as I did then

blissed out in the vibe of the heart music

Let’s follow our bliss 🙂





Blue Storm ~ tears are flowing


Blue Galactic Storm Day


A day of integration in the Mayan energy of the year.

We are at a crossroads of our evolution ~ will we choose to stay the same and do the same ~ be of the same beliefs and therefore create that same reality?

My offering

this time is about connecting to our heart and listening to our desires ❤
This journey we are on is for the love of ourselves 🙂

The only person that ever holds us back is ourself and our belief in who we are ~ that has been created over this lifetime and many before ❤

This wave of light that is coming from our sun ~ solar flares ~ is the liquid light of love from our universal masculine energy of information.

To be able to benefit at our optimum ~ we open like a flower to receive it’s message and remember how amazing we are. We are a part of all of the universe and one of it’s many creators 🙂

There is no grand plan we “must” do “should” do or any need to “prove ourself ~ we are enough.

The life we live here often takes us through experiences where we have taken on a belief that we are not loveable, not good enough, less than……

This is the essence of the blue storm energy.

Underneath the rage, anger, beliefs of conspiracy, injustice , fear of being out of control ~

Is our own personal experience, our own personal story.

This is our salvation and the salvation of our planet ❤

Underneath all this intellectual armoury there is a hurt child.

The wonder of the Mayan wave spell for me has been connecting to and raising consciousness of the universal pattern and my pattern within it. A cog within a cog.

Yesterday I awoke with memories of events that have happened in my life and I started to check the dates with the Mayan calendar.

I put together a thirteen year cycle of my life that encompassed my travel adventures at 17 and culminated in me becoming a mother at 29. As I started to connect the dots and look at each year my awareness grew and I understood more about my journey and how each step had been integral to the formation of my being today.

As I reconnected to this time , I touched powerful memories and emotions.
I was surprised by the intensity ~ often it is the case with my learning about the emotional mind. We “think” we have got over a time of life that caused us emotional pain only to feel a very different reality ❤

I am experiencing huge waves of grief now and as I cry I tap to truly let go energetically of the part of me that has felt unloved.

This < I believe > is the nature and intention of this time.

If you are feeling very heavy, unwell, low in energy…….

There is something seeking release now ❤

That is all it is 🙂

If you allow yourself to give space to these unreleased feelings being heard and accepted and released…….

There is more light to shine and glow with 🙂

New possibilities to come in as we grieve and allow our shadow to be integrated through feeling our repressed feelings.

Our strength comes from being vulnerable.

Maybe you haven’t cried in a very long time ?

Do you remember how it feels after a deep cleansing cry when your body has felt that pain in it’s gut, your sobs have exhausted you… tears run freely down your face

After this storm of emotion it is possible to feel a huge sense of peace ❤

As children this often comes easily when very young and experiencing a physical pain ~ often adults start to repress their child’s natural healing reaction out of embarrassment if in a public place, out of guilt, inability to fix it for the child, their inability to go through their own emotional storm…..

Everything that has ever happened to us and our planet has been perfect for it’s time and our evolution.

Now there are new things to be born…….
New ways of relating……
Remembrance and awakening on a much larger scale for many thousands of years in this cycle ❤

Things that came up for me yesterday that may resonate for you ~ I was focusing on a period of 1983 ~ 1985

How I was at 17 ~ my hopes and dreams, how I related to my family, at work, how I felt there was more to life than a 9 to 5

My feminine self ~ how I was with men , how my belief about myself was so different to their beliefs about me ~ how I wanted to be loved and never felt loved for me ~ how I felt so confused/wrong/trying to please

My female friends ~ often feeling I couldn’t connect, issues of loyalty, competitiveness, how to have intimacy with my friends ~ a feeling that we were all looking to have deeper meaningful connections with each other and struggling to be adults. Losing friends because of relationships with men. Confusing friendship with sexual relationships.

Allowing myself to lose my way and my power and paying a huge price ~ one that was key to my understanding now ~ and none the less painful because of it.

That little girl inside of me desperate to win others hearts…..and unable to….

Searching for happiness, searching for the one…….

Believing I found the one over and over……

finding it was a myth 🙂 I am the one…….
Strengthening my love for myself and who I am ………

This human child in each one of us I speak of ,is very different to our spiritual self. This is our shadow self seeking to be reunited and integrated.
The child that never ages and matures unless it is allowed to be heard ❤

Wherever we have felt less than ~ we have felt other than joy and love ~ is creating our path every day……

Bringing us exactly what seeks integration.

Time to ride the wave of our emotions as they are the true bringers of the new dawn.

Love to you today and your tears ❤ ❤ ❤

Our eyes are the windows of our soul.
Forgiving all our woes allows us to have clear vision to connect to our dreams and see new paths ❤ ❤ ❤