Blue Crystal Night
Day 12 of
Yellow Human Wavespell
Please click on the links to take you to new places ~ other websites that expand on this
Today we are in the land of dreams and nightmares.
This energy is all about transformation ~ as it is a blue sign.
Blue Night Tribe
Today we are in waxing Cancer Moon
Today we are connecting to the Masculine in Aquarius and the new age that we are birthing in our masculine sun energy.
Cancer Moon is the sacred feminine of home, mothering and nurturing.
If you have a birthday today then this is your energy for the year that you are working with.
This means you are in year 12
of a thirteen year cycle.
This year gives an opportunity to become crystal clear about this energy within you and how you choose to transform anything that gives rise to nightmares in your sleeping state ~
metaphors that reveal through feelings in dreams
past issues seeking enlightenment by bringing them up to consciousness
stirring the soup and letting our deeper selves
rise to the surface
so we can transform them and create energy and awareness
to set us free from our past
integrate
go through the door and back to the garden 🙂
Are you ready to create a core within yourself
that creates stability ?
That is the only way you can create a stability of feeling about our ever changing world ~
at this particular time it is so changeable and it is happening quickly.
To survive the key way of being is flexibility ~ to be able to move with the white water rapids that are happening now
To be open to new learning and how to create change ~ each one of us knowing that ourselves and taking responsibility for it
letting go of any unhealthy dependencies as we shape our destiny with our own hands
The first place to do this is within
Picture Alex Gray
I am sharing this with the intention of illustrating where I am coming from in these posts and what has brought me to today.
Some of my journey in life so far has been very enjoyable and some has been very painful.
I have learnt from both areas
and most of my transition has come from the
not so enjoyable parts.
In our society this part is only just coming to
light now ~ at the perfect time.
We learn through our painful times of struggle and strife and that is the polarity framework on planet earth
When we accept that is how it is
and go with it
we see the silver lining
when we have done it enough
we reach a tipping pint and we transcend it
Most people still work purely with expanding their positive ~
why not this is so comfortable for the ego ?
and
we have very positive reinforcement for this in society
There are a lot of positives about the ego and most people only understand what it is with a very limited reference point because
they haven’t done any in depth work
on themselves
this is the true meaning of karma and Code
When we start to do it
we are learning experientially through the process
this has a ripple effect
this is the law of attraction in action
Once we start to
be the code in everything we do
we access more and more of anything that is coded in that way
It really is simple when we look at it this way isn’t it ?
I am speaking about this with the intention of communicating awareness
and
each individual will read it
and give meaning to it
based on their belief systems
Many people have an intellectual understanding of a concept and bandy it about in relationship with others
however they have no understanding of how people actually learn or have any experiential awareness of this and so it is simply skimming the surface
For example most people do not understand
that one of our key ways of learning is we
model
This link above explains this in detail
Albert Bandura’s development model
In our families we model our role model’s which is one of the key reasons why we repeat familiar patterns even though some of these are abusive and seemingly very illogical
Why model a behaviour that has hurt us such as sexual abuse, physical abuse or alcoholism ?
We do what we know that is why and we also make choices to learn or stay the same
Remember the saying
Do what I say not what I do
Did your parent’s ever say that to you ?
Did it work ?
Chances are you copied their behaviour in many respects and if you personally didn’t you will attract someone into your life that did ?
Can you spot them?
This is why when baby animals are brought into captivity from the wild ~ such as Rhinos they are put with other grazing animals so they can model them and learn how to be a grazing animal. This can be a sheep for the purpose of modelling grazing, in the absence of a Rhino adult, according to a documentary I watched.
If someone has never experienced receiving respect they do not know how to do the behaviour respect and unless they are taught it and give and receive it
they cannot be it
To go a level deeper
If a person has had events where they were
disrespected in their life
until they heal that and how they felt
and are still feeling on a deep level of consciousness
then pattern matches of these events will keep showing up because
that is their holographic signature
and they show up so healing and new learning can begin
Now the ego doesn’t like this because it cannot control it
Often a person creates ego strategies to try and control it and these develop in childhood and become more complex over time
behavioural for example ~ be passive, be aggressive, get a lot of wealth to avoid it, be clever, start a religious war etc
Every person on planet earth has an ego
that is our shared humanity
and each ego is either in it’s raw state and acting without consciousness
or in process of raising consciousness through self awareness….
because that individual has no awareness of ego and how it works
or has awareness of that intellectually but hasn’t done anything energetically or emotionally to transform their personal
emotional triggers
and there is nothing “wrong” with any of those places of being
It is what makes the world go round
it is what it is
It is our emotional evolution
Education is very important for raising
self
awareness
at the moment most education of young people on planet earth is focusing on the world around them with the intention of “gainful employment”
There is very little education about the child themselves and how they become self aware
even about practical matters such as how to cope with life generally
that is of no interest to the ego model of consumerism ~ self awareness is not wanted because self aware people do not comply with it
If a child doesn’t want to learn from this model then they are seen as a problem and attempts made to make them comply and in the UK this hasn’t changed in 40 years ~ I have experiential knowledge of that as I have worked with young people and these systems and learned a lot from them
The people who are teachers often do not have any self awareness either so….
this creates a pattern
Generally many inspiring teachers who are coming from an integrated and knowing place
leave the system because it is not the same code
It is impossible for them to be there
Most of the codes in today’s schools are about compliance and becoming a product of the consumer machine
Judgement is a part of that
Being judged and labelled and whipped into shape
Discernment is another code entirely and if people are stuck in the code of Judgement then they often haven’t accessed discernment with intellectually or experientially 🙂
If someone has been on the receiving end of judging….
then
there is code there about that
To Judge someone subjectively means to label them into one of two areas of polarity
right/wrong
good/bad
to place a meaning about someone’s behaviour
and if you have escaped that learning you are a rare being indeed
because this is endemic and systemic in our world today
and a very
favoured sorting tool of the ego so it knows what is good and bad for it
It is a very immature and basic sorting mechanism that keeps the ego feeling it is acting in safe mode and living in a righteous way
which is very subjective to that individual’s experience of what they believe is “right” and “wrong” according to their modelling
often this is simply taking on their family, friends and society’s beliefs without any questioning or deeper processing ~ no conscious exploration and blind acceptance
It also has a pathological code as well ~ to strip someone of their ability to be self reliant and stand up to bullying and is often used in that way to undermine an individual that isn’t being compliant and to create genocide as seemingly a righteous solution to people who have sufficient fear
no reasoning
no common sense
no love
no compassion
no sense of true self happening only ego borrowing from other people to create itself
When this is a way of being ~ someone’s complex structure
the sense of self comes from outside and is validated by the outside
Everything in undeveloped and untrained ego structure is affected by the outside world
and often the
person feels
at everything and everyone’s mercy
and this is therefore their reality
Life happens to them
they are in a victim code of feeling disempowered
because that is the truth of their internal structure
When our ego ~ our human being ness ~ is externally referenced then
everything external is seen as the source of all joy and pain
When the truth is
we can change this when we train and transform our ego
focus on what is feeling painful
our triggers
and instead of wanting to annihilate them , control them, blame them
we focus on our inner source and restructure it
Our feelings then become our guide to our dream
instead of suppressing them and repressing them
using escape and coping mechanisms such as alcohol, drugs, workshops, sex, nicotine, sugar, workouts
we go to our core and find out what messages our feelings want to share
about our life journey so far and what we have come here for
our soul journey
all of this is connected and is the ancient process
When we reach middle age to use a computer analogy
our hard drive becomes full
and initiates
mid life crisis
just like on planet earth
we are full of all these old patterns of the opposite of right relationship
our planetary cup is full
especially in Somerset where I live ~ there are floods everywhere
the boundaries have become eroded
Each one of us can empty our cache now and in our own cleansing
cleanse the world
Certain energetic codes really resist showing
emotion and working with it
These are revealed in the Zodiac
People who have had big emotional traumas and choose to stuff down their emotions
put a brace face on it
and stay strong
are using a coping mechanism of the ego that does not create healing
It is the antithesis of healing
the anti christ if you will in terms of christ consciousness
and by christ consciousness I mean a way of relating that is coming from
ego transformation that is love and understanding in truth
experientially
having transformed all our wounding events
so that we have a natural place of love and compassion
Picture Alex Gray
When new learning comes along that doesn’t fit our ego’s map of the world ~
it’s understanding and belief system
we often get a map clash
and if that ego isn’t willing to be open to new ideas it will use it’s favourite coping mechanism which is
Denial
here is a great video about 911 to illustrate this point
It is with reference to that event and explains the meaning of denial generally
Our ego is the soul seed of our evolution
and is a powerhouse of potential
When you have been on the receiving end of narcissistic rage you feel the force
and
unfortunately when this place of darkness and
code of not feeling
or not expressing feelings of the shadow
is reached
there is little hope of it happening because
a narcissist will not look at their own ego experiences of hurt
and rarely seeks any help because they do not believe there is anything unhealthy about them
often these experiences are found in childhood
and are never resolved because of the belief that everyone else has the problem
and the only way to transmute all this pain is to scapegoat someone else
and turn them into the focus
they are the bad ones
This code of blame is part of the victim pattern
and is part of the human spectrum of emotional evolution
In families we have people who play different roles and wear masks to form a holographic picture
Instead of each person being whole and integrated with their own well rounded healthy ego and persona
It isn’t anyone’s fault
It is how our western society has evolved so that we can evolve
The first step is to recognise that
and that is difficult for many people trapped in victimhood
because to do that takes courage
and taking responsibility for our own feelings
that we choose how we feel every time
we choose how we behave every time
Emotional Intelligence is a key part of this way of being
In a family that has alcoholism for example.
There will be a learned behaviour about alcohol
and as I was growing up
most people didn’t even recognise it is a drug
Because it is legal ~ and cannabis isn’t
a generalisation can be made that because alcohol is legal it is ok, it is safe
That again is coming from immature ego
alcohol is legal because of many reasons and nothing to do with it being safe
Lots of agendas around alcohol
and how we choose to relate to it is
our choice
As a young person, me and most of my peers learned that to have recreation time meant getting drunk
getting legless in fact
Lots of media at that time showed people relaxing with alcohol and cigarettes
When you had a “bad” day at the office ~ get drunk
Drink at lunchtime
Party at weekend
What has changed on mainstream media today ?
It was socially acceptable
My guess is that today in the UK
there is a very high percentage of the
population who use the coping mechanism of
alcohol to get through their day to day
to” relax “
and that they cannot do without it and yet do not see themselves as “addicted”
and most people cannot have one drink and stop
or one cigarette and stop
or heroin now and again
or a soap opera once a month
or one crisp
one piece of chocolate
This is wired in to our amygdala as a way to feel good
We all have our own coping mechanisms that we have become addicted to
and most people do not see that
some addictions have more harmful side effects than others
they help us to cope with relationships
that are not honest,
authentic
or truly loving
and as that is the basis of our society
living from untrained ego
out of balance
living an artificial life
and having to be dishonest in every way
as a result
In virtually every family there is someone high on the narcissist spectrum ~
doesn’t want to feel to heal
To counteract this there is an enabler
The scapegoat who can be blamed and held responsible for the source of the narcissist’s pain and enables them to stay unconscious
There is often a whole family tree history on this
If you have interacted with someone who has a lot of anger and is high on the spectrum of narcissism
and you have done something to highlight their true lack of control
pull the rug on this dishonest way of living
they will seek to destroy you
If you have been or are in this situation this is a great source of information about it
Be mindful of how you connect and perhaps minimising your exposure to small chunks
Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
When this first starts it may be physical bullying
this happened to me at school when I stood up to someone bullying someone else
this created a whole pattern over my lifetime
in all areas of my life especially the corporate world
Following the cosmic cookie trail of co dependency and bullying
and I have been tapping on this today again ~ I use emotional freedom technique because it works for me
Since becoming a therapist I have encountered many narcissists as clients or clients family as that is my attraction
One of my first client’s in fact led me to discover what the term was because I knew that something dishonest was going on in our sessions and I couldn’t put my finger on it so I went on a whole journey of research
this is the gift of learning this energy can bring
at first I found it very challenging and it triggered lots of fear responses in me and revealed confidence issues and lack of self~ belief
I was in a relationship in my 20’s with a narcissist and I became very ill on a physical and mental level
When I was drunk the part of me I repressed when sober came out and I spoke the truth
and paid the price on all levels
Instead of learning how to create healthy relationships I simply looked for addictive fixes
alcohol and drugs to escape and relax
let go of being shy
sex to feel valuable, worthy and loved
When I was “sober” and single I felt the truth of what I did when I became this suppressed persona
and I was always suppressing and trying to be “perfect”
be a people pleaser
to please
be what the narcissist wanted me to be
and of course this narcissist energy was also in me
How I really felt came out at the office parties to my boss
who was behaving inappropriately as my boss ~ his true self emerging
when my bullying boyfriend fought with his friend
when my friends were absent emotionally and I could be honest about how I felt
It wasn’t nice of course
you know the story because you have one too 🙂
When we are repressing our true nature somewhere it has to come out somewhere else to balance itself
this is the bi-polar pattern
swings and roundabouts
This scenario keeps playing out throughout our life until we decide to do something about it.
Take away the rose tinted glasses
the vino
the trip to la la land
and look at how we are creating our reality from all these parts
how our family parts are pulling at our heart strings
and breaking away from these roles
Taking off the mask
evolving
The Narcissist is a great teacher because through our interaction we can really see our complex stability in action
When someone is acting without consciousness because they have been triggered we may be on the receiving end of the sum total of their rage ~
years of events of uncleared emotion that is in full throttle and the sum total all channeled
at you
the trigger
There is no way to bring consciousness as they are not conscious
Nothing you can do or say can unlock their spell
You can say it anyway if you choose and it may add fuel to the fire
It is like being a child again with an angry adult who has all the answers of unreason
and all the power
and yes I have been there with my children in this role
Sorry
whatever we say to an unconscious rager
they will only see their meaning
It can feel very disempowering and upsetting
when someone wants to hold you responsible and destroy you
for something you didn’t do
and give you their guilt trip instead of feeling it and dealing with it
and the more we do our journey and work on our self~belief and self ~ esteem
and all our bullying and narc encounters
the more we can be present
and
let go of our fear
and let go of taking on this other person’s attempt to create the Scapegoat in us
because we no longer hold the code for that
When I am in the presence of this relationship most of the coping mechanisms I have created
cannot be used
intelligence, reasoning and honesty
no dice
this person wants to hurt me because I have removed a veil
a curtain has been drawn back
without their consent
light coming in
At the moment I do not feel compassion for them ~ that may change over time
with more layers in my journey
At the moment I know that their way of being is not love
and so I do not match it with love
I know this pattern in history has created terrible things and is doing so now
“it’s just business”
so
I want no part of it
No matter how many times I have to face the narcissist
I will
and I will not give way to them
and their distortion
born from living a lie
It is what we are here to create
right relations
and learn how to create our dream from the inside out
letting go of our nightmares by following
simple moral codes
that aren’t rocket science
and yet build amazing light structures
from the stars
of the heart
If you would like to experience how EFT works for you
Please get in touch
I offer a free consultation
You can work on what you wish to create
and let go of your past creations
and this creates a different code
You create the code
You have the answers
You are the dreamer in the dream
Everything that has ever happened to you can be a part of that way of being
Taking our power back involves taking responsibility
for our choices in life
That was then
This is now
What are we choosing
Now ?
Love to your emotional evolution
and ours
Jo
I
flow with jo 