Day nine of the White Worldbridger Day and today is the ninth day ~ White Solar Wizard. This is always a round up day as a nine and if you are a number nine in the Mayan calendar then this is key for you as a time for having completed a cycle ~ maybe the sum total of many lives . This time around you are really here to get your soul show shining brightly and chances are you have had lots of learning early in your life around feeling separation and a stranger in your own land, your own family. A cuckoo in the nest, an alien in your tribe ~ on a different planet to the rest of your peer group 🙂

There is a very good reason for that 🙂

Number nine’s can be completion of pattern clearers when they clear their own energy and belief systems that they have learned in the first couple of segments of life ~ childhood and early adulthood. Often this manifests in midlife as a course correction ~ if we have veered far away from our star seeded course and gone down the ego path.

Over the Scorpio full moon and lunar eclipse we have been revisiting old goo and patterns that are seeking release so we can be reborn. Take heart if you have been having a tough time of experience and illness as this is what Scorpio energy brings. Depending on where you are on your soul journey and time of life this can be very potent. Taurus and Scorpio axis on Thursday reveals big value issues that go deeper than material worth and material structures and patterns. Time to let go and move into new circles once more.

There is another major eclipse coming up on May 9th solar eclipse with sun and moon in Taurus and this links into the World Bridger energy ~ it is a galactic day ~ integration and all about death of old ways of being ~ duality ~ two worlds . Starting on May the 2nd we have Blue Storm Wavespell which is the energy of this year ~ releasing our addictions and being authentic.

Glastonbury brings a super charge evolution and expansion process and will expand exactly where you are in all ways. How you work with that energy depends on several things and a key area is the shadow. I am hosting a retreat in August in the Gemini part of the zodiac that you may be interested in ~ more info coming soon ~ if you feel it may be of interest please message me 🙂

It can be an unsettling place for any initiate as the wonder of Glastonbury as the heart chakra is ~ feel the love. The shadow aspect ~ feel where the blocks to love and self acceptance and then a crossroads 🙂 It is a challenge to be disciplined in this place of illusion and choose the heart path.

• Choose to feel the blocks and let your soul take you through ego transformation and looking within at the ego defence mechanisms you have learned as a child…….?
• Live in denial in never never land and use addictive behaviours that shape shift to keep that shadow covered ~ like Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak ?
• Become the shadow behaviour and manipulate all the signs that your soul is bringing to show you where enlightenment can happen using smoke and mirrors ~ avoidance?

Seeing what is driving that bus of behaviour can give some clarity 🙂

I have had an enlightening few days with lots of physical stuff going on ~ feeling sick and huge headaches on the actual day of Scorpio full moon which was when I was doing my EFT Circle. Feeling the pull to create new choices and alignments in lots of my world spaces. My card yesterday ~ Reach for the stars and let go of the low vibes 🙂

Yesterday I felt a lot better ~ there was a sting in the tail just as I was least expecting it with a big trigger around behaviour I have experienced many times in the past and something I feel very strongly about. Time to explore and create new boundaries for myself and how I relate.

It can be difficult to get clear about anything in Glastonbury for any period of time ~ it’s nature is to bring heart healing and free from the mind my offering on it is this ~ the universe brings us what we need not what we want which I have come to really experience on a personal level in the past few years at my mid life turning point and as this is relatively new learning for me ~ and a paradigm shift  ~ so all old rules are off that my mind and ego are used to ~ it can feel frustrating and exhausting as I go through this evolutionary tunnel for myself. I know it leads to more light if I choose to go there though. Getting easier to see the gateway points now.

The more I clear any resistance to that , through being shown earlier life events that link in to this resistance ~ and have formed beliefs and opinions about it and emotion that is on the fear spectrum ~ the more learning I have and the more I have expanded my awareness and consciousness. My intention is to allow myself to open my heart more and more and be open to things and ways that I may not yet know so I can evolve ~ otherwise I stay stuck in what I have become in the past on a human level ~ I live my life led by my head and by my ego and in that framework I am stuck on a revolving roundabout of mutating ego manoeuvres.

One of my challenges of being open and connecting to other people is that in the past people often get the impression on meeting me that I don’t know anything about anything because I don’t do the ego show…..and I don’t want to….. and I am looking at finding new ways to relate here in person 🙂

Part of my harmonising pattern has precluded me from speaking out in the past when something comes up that I feel isn’t loving behaviour and gentle and respectful ~ I have always been scapegoated when I bring up issues that people do not want to deal with and I do not want to impact aggressively or disrespectfully in other people’s life paths as that is a key value for me. Also I often have felt I don’t know enough about whatever it is …….that doesn’t seem to stop other people from speaking and “teaching” and……many people are teaching something that isn’t implicitly expressed and yet that is what is being expressed.That isn’t a behaviour I wish to model consciously with intent.

This has led to lots of inner enquiry and tapping ( EFT) for me . It was very much a theme of our circle on thursday. Some people who have experienced manipulation and unloving behaviour by caretakers are very aware of how that feels and do not want to pass that pain parcel on ~ so the dilemma is ?

How can we speak our truth and be in our masculine energy without creating the same relating pattern with others ?

If we want to move out of this framework and evolve this is key. My feeling is ~ until I have removed my anger from these times in the past when I was on the receiving end ~ I will struggle with this in my behaviour ~…….I am learning to speak up and stand in my power and share my knowingness and at a full moon time this can be very heightened. I have witnessed lots of power tripping workshops in Glastonbury especially ~ masquerading as something else and I do not like the dishonesty.

The Emperor’s New Clothes ~ what to say ? Who is truly aware of what they are doing and being dishonest about it ……and if you speak up ……..how many will pretend that they do not agree ( although behind the net curtains……..) because they need that co dependent structure like a heroin user ? My code of behaviour now is avoiding drama if I can……unless something directly affects me in a way I feel is abusive , I choose not to engage ….otherwise I would spend all my time in this drama …….

I am focusing on what directly affects me and being the heroine in my own life 

I came to Glastonbury as a cosmic nudge ~ it wasn’t on any goal plan I had 🙂 My mind interpreted many things and I followed it’s lead creating workshops based on what I had learned both through knowledge ~ books, courses, workshops and experience ~ my real life practicality . My heart led me to Glastonbury ~ I didn’t know why I came ~ I trusted my gut that I needed to come at a time when I was allowing myself to be drawn to where I had my next life stage. This has gone in a different way to what I expected especially in learning about the Mayan calendar ~ it wasn’t what I thought it was and what it truly is ~ is wow 🙂 I have had to go through lots of illusions in this process ~ in this place anything goes 🙂 It’s a wild ride ~ shakes the core.

Honing that way of being and allowing that to happen was a huge crossroads for me. I believe it happened because I had done a huge amount of energy clearing with my own patterns and wounding and with my clients that I attracted ~ in particular on healing my feminine archetypal relationships and beliefs. Allowing myself to receive again was key ……and refining that by seeing clearly what was repeating when that happened and my own role in the relationship.

In my training and working as a therapist I have been on many events and workshops and worked with therapists as their therapist. One of the key patterns of a therapist or a coach is around self empowerment, people pleasing, fixing,and a need to be needed ~ a need to be in control.

This has been my journey ~ facing my shadow around my passive and aggressive aspects of my personality and behaviour and how I have been working with co~dependency issues. How I learned as a child , ways of behaving to empower myself which were often manipulative ~ people pleasing ~ from caretakers that were not in any way conscious or aware of these patterns ( so I believe ). My journey has been to transcend these patterns and behaviours and let go of relating in this way. I am very mindful of not jumping in with two feet in a situation that I haven’t had time to observe and understand and of letting my mind lead with assumptions……and this is a work in progress. If I have energy to clear on this and it is compelling, I am aware that I can do that, because once triggered into that energy I am coming from that place in some way.

The more we clear this energy the less that happens. We become the divine child again, clear from ego…..

Today’s energy is all about that ~ being empowered from the heart

and letting the magical universe flow through us instead of thinking

the tool has the power 🙂

This wizard energy is manifest in many aspects and I love Sonia Choquette’s book about this  ~ Souls lesson and purpose ~ which asks the reader which level they are at ~ experientially 🙂 Are we a novice ~ well versed in this issue ~ achieving mastery of it over many revisits 🙂 ?

The Mystery schools and magical practices often focus on outside of self rituals and ceremonies.

This is key to understanding ~ discernment. Many people often struggle with the concept of discernment and confuse it with judgement ~ and my offering on this is :

Judgement confusion ~ judgement energy to be cleared ~ issues around self esteem, not feeling good enough, not wanting to look at self, poor me, victim, inner child stuff . Triggers around this always reveal times in the past when this has occurred to the person feeling an emotional response and wanting to deflect that by various avoidance methods.

Using mind techniques to create debate ~ 

The ego wearing the clever coat ~ this is a big NLP pattern. The elite club with a new language and set of masculine energy tools that elevate them to godlike proportion ~ all these new words to confuse people with so I can outdo them 🙂  ~ they won’t be able to win at an argument and my ego can feel superior. 

I have been to NLP events where people speak in NLP’isms and cover their heart, leading on intellect ~head to head ~ no honest , intimate communication to be felt ~ and in real life you often find that people who seek this pattern  have experienced huge powerlessness and been manipulated in earlier life ~ often on a very abusive scale. They attract predators and seek to deal with these predators by outwitting them with their new laser light sword ~ darth vadar style. If only they would look within and feel their true force ~ the source and allow it to shine brightly ~ the magic would truly flow from the heart . Experientially I have seen many people on this trip and watched them “play” with other people with their new tools ~ and I do not like this behaviour.

People who haven’t cleared their wound pattern energetically and have the discipline to create new patterns that move away from co-dependence ……………….

cannot access new energetic circles ~ they simply morph onto a seemingly new plan …..but it’s the same old pattern deep down and they simply sabotage themselves because they aren’t  ready to enlighten within………..

In past history the magical traditions focus on creating masculine patterns and use intellectual process ~ now is the time of the sacred feminine on a large scale and following the heart path from within.

As the picture shows ~ and was the energy yesterday ~ Red Galactic Skywalker , this is about balancing our masculine and feminine within and in the process freeing our inner child.

The journey is a process and experiential. 

You cannot do this outside of yourself ~ any knowledge raises awareness ~ to integrate that knowledge requires experiencing it for yourself.

If you are using knowledge without having experienced it then where is the integrity ?

Our patriarchal pattern of evolution has been having ways of living enforced without our conscious informed consent and this is perfect for our soul evolution.

Now some of us, are understanding that this expanded patriarchal pattern has a way of relating to us that is very out of balance and unhealthy for us.

The planet is at the remit of a minority of ego centric people who control the majority and the majority have to live according to their plan  ~ which is a small percentage of the people have the wealth and live in a world of opulence made from the efforts of the majority of people who live in poverty  ~ this is a result of our collective conscious awareness and belief systems. It is a similar pattern to the Virgin media logo ~ which isn’t equal and isn’t a number eight 🙂 Guess which side it is heavily influenced on ? Perfect for where we are now ~ and moving away from.

The levels of profit have expanded so that in our factory pharma food have maximum cheap ingredients that have been manipulated and distorted and have no nutritional value ~ to match our collective  co dependent beliefs that someone should nurture us and we are unable to nurture ourselves, then if we choose we can blame them and avoid taking responsibility for ourselves……or take responsibility and create ways to nurture ourselves.

Did we have conscious awareness of this? Did we give informed consent? Did we actually collude in this process…….on a soul level we choose all our experiences ?

Consciously in my humanity……no I didn’t choose this and why on earth would I ?…… and I choose to create a world that is different to this …..which is what I choose to create within me and share with others who are of a like mind and seek to balance within and what I believe I came here to do at this time.

I accept that going through places and learning that may not feel good  is part of my learning curve 🙂

In this process of moving away from this ~ what I am going to term ~ unloving behaviour ~ and a hugely popular way of relating in Glastonbury ~ one of the clever ego defence mechanisms is to focus on one aspect and one polarity swing instead of looking at the whole ~ and again this happens because that aspect hasn’t been cleared and in that process ~ integrated.

This is distortion at work ~ and reveals a belief ~ isolating who takes responsibility  and exclusive rather than inclusive ~ a child like belief system that excludes certain parties ~ on a pattern level revealing fragmentation. It isn’t inclusive and it isn’t integrated which reveals what lies beneath.

Here is my view on this ~

If you are hosting a workshop or facilitating a process there is a responsibility inherent in that ~ take full responsibility for being the initiator and be honest about what you are doing ……and allow your participants to make an informed choice…..and if you aren’t capable of doing that……because you don’t have enough learning yet and are a novice…..then maybe consider waiting until you do….take responsibility for your position. Do an ecology check 🙂 If someone is teaching you about NLP do they teach about using this with respect and awareness…..or how they mesmerise and control people? How powerful you can become ~ like a speed junkie 18 year old in a Suburu 😉 How do they advertise ~ what are their manipulation techniques for getting you on their course ? See clearly and what is really attracting you to it 🙂 Is it Alpha driven? Is it a short cut to an ego identity that is surface pond skimming and has no deep foundation ? Is it coming from a bigger picture view or a skewed angle perspective?

Yes each adult can take responsibility…..and they don’t know what they don’t know………what are you choosing to co create and what is sponsoring that creation? Heart or ego led? What is the intention ?

As always this is a big learning for me too.

If you have just started learning something new , that is a powerful transformational tool ,  maybe be a guinea pig for it yourself  for a good while and use it over a period of time so see how it affects you ~ before you use it on someone else especially people who are vulnerable and seeking to open their heart, in particular children.

What is your therapeutic/relationship/psychological understanding and experience  ~ what foundation is this being built on?

To work with an adult is one thing ~  generally they have learned a lot about relating in some way and again if they are in a place of extreme vulnerability  ~ be very careful about proceeding with anything and explain in depth about where you are coming from, what you offer and how you believe it will work. Instead of making assumptions ~ ask questions and be clear and honest about what your intention is and what theirs is …..as much as you can

Maybe instead of using an avoidance of ……well it is their responsibility, they didn’t ask, I am not their caretaker bla bla bla Deferring any responsibility

and I have heard it so often in Glastonbury

How do we know the questions to ask? 

I grew up believing that people are innately good and choose to relate to me from that place ~ over time I have learned that people aren’t all coming from an honest loving space and so I have learned to be discerning.

I watch my children and see how so often they have trusted and believed whatever is advertised on TV and revisited my own child process …..and seen how the rules of manipulation have changed and experienced them too. At one time a product couldn’t be termed “The Best” and was labelled with the prefix of “possibly” now it seems that anything goes……

Each time we go into a world of consumerism we are open to manipulation ~ each supermarket, TV, the shopping mall, the sales call and all of these worlds specialise in understanding the ego mind and how to manipulate it.

If you choose to perpetuate this system and be part of it’s expansion then choose these patterns ~ all is good in our world of co creation and evolution. 

If you want to make it fit ~ it has to be now ~ it is time …..and it is coming from the ego mind ~ choose patterns and process to override your inner emotions and squash them down so your ego can journey on and you can ignore your body wisdom and your sacred feminine .

Whenever we pattern interrupt a process an aspect of this is blocking the message, the inner child choosing to speak and reveal an enlightenment opportunity.

The more we engage in that process the more we empower our ego and disempower our heart wisdom.

If someone had a huge trauma it may be helpful to let go of that trauma…….and maybe….to understand, learn and evolve from it……instead of blocking it out as though it never happened……because……

I believe it happened for a reason……everything does.

Our shadow always shows for a reason at the perfect time and if we choose to ignore it then a bigger nudge will come later in time.

Being in balance is the key  ~ focusing on being in a joyful space and patterns that support that ~ on the happy horse ~ and when we are not ~ what is causing that.

If our ego believes it can override the universal cycle ~ wow ~ we have a big ego shadow ~ the narcissist pattern ~ some deep  wound that is very powerful. We can override our innate knowingness…… and many people do ~ the majority of people on the planet at this time . This is free will.

This has a huge price to pay ~ I prefer a model of being our authentic selves and creating a way of living that truly feels good without any need for addictions, material props and ego structures.

Whilst we are dependent on these our house of cards will be prone to collapsing at every breath of wind or heavy footed giant shaking our treasure tree.

On a practical level how can I empower myself from the heart ?

The masculine , linear mind is very important in our process and being empowered to use it in balance is the key ~

Until we energetically clear our first part of life on earth we aren’t ready to take the next step of our space journey ~ in the EFT Circle I used a space metaphor of a rocket split into three.

We start at Earth and we move from Mars to Venus  – masculine to feminine – and let go of any heavy vibes by using internal alchemy of changing our shadow to light and in the process creating super powered rocket fuel which will propel us onwards 🙂

Creating goals empowers us to create our dream and get practical ~ make a plan ~ then……

let go of how that is going to happen because you are choosing to go on any journey and the universe will bring you that process ~ be open to it

and take action ~ being aware of yourself and your patterns is key.

The tools I have for becoming aware ~ if you are ready to look at your patterns are:

Mayan Sign and Starcode ~ this reveals your soul mission and energetic code

If something is coming up for you that is blocking your well-being I offer energy coaching and have lots of resources you can use for this to be aware of the universal time  that is influencing this , my intention is to empower you to do this yourself using Emotional Freedom Technique~

The Mayan Wavespell calendar ~ this is my version with links to lots of other creative sources

You can work with this each day to become aware of what is happening in the universal forces to create change

What has happened to me in the past at this time?

This is a document to raise personal awareness of that My Karma Wheel ~ pages and pdf and ……maybe create your own.

Being aware of Karma patterns with Kalma Karma and Co Dependency

When you have the intention to become aware ~ all will be revealed, at the perfect moment, for you to work with and empower yourself…….

If you are ready to be the phoenix rising from the ashes

If you are ready to evolve and let go of old ego ways of being and be truly a magical process.

A wasp appeared at The Heart Centre this week ~ paying attention to what is happening in our day to day world is key and is a divine message from our universal self ~ if we are ready to see 🙂

A message I got yesterday ~ Igor ~ not watched this……love the connection ~ I can see clearly now which is what this Blue Storm Energy Year is all about 🙂

 

Here’s a video about Triggers with a video soon about the next step ~ when the shadow is revealed with emotion