White Wizard Wavespell cycle completes on day 9
still four days to built on this completion though and what will this bring for our self empowerment and white water rafting ?
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the magic is flowing through me in torrents
yet I am guessing this may not be the case 😉
So many endings I don’t know where to begin 🙂
Scorpio as the eight month has brought integration
which often comes through dissonance
which was my Mayan Oracle card for today
is clearly my cue
My past life South Node was in Sagittarius as my present soul trip is in Gemini
where did I leave off to begin this pattern with my Sagi starter for 10 ?
One of my key areas of learning is relationships
How to create equal, healthy, balanced relationships with primarily myself
my higher self.
I am asking for assistance with my next steps
right now 🙂
I am again learning more about the Narcissist pattern
through experience of course
this is always a favourite Scorpio gateway topic of mine
how it has been the foundation stone of our harsh world reality
in our past generations
because it was designed by the ego on the inside, to allow people to survive huge emotional events
that they couldn’t deal with
there is a price to pay for that of course
and everyone pays it whether they want to….
this is what we are seeing manifest on the outside
all the fragmented child behaviours, thoughts and beliefs
that create disharmony
ways of relating that are malign
not a happy life affirming match pattern
Thank you to a lovely Leo for sharing this with me 🙂
Our consumer pattern on the world stage
expanded this creative ploy after seeing how much money can be made at a time of deep scarcity and struggle….
such as depressions and times of huge resistance ~ war
It is a great way to sate the ego
so it doesn’t feel any pain.
This is the useful purpose of addictions
to numb our hurting
but using them only serves to make the wound go deeper
so next time a bigger fix is required.
Time to wean ourselves off this now so we can feel good without any crutches
and intention is
Murder or manslaughter ?
The intention decides whether the outcome of death is contrived or by accident
yet there is still a culpability
in both cases.
Honesty can be helpful here so that each party can learn new ways to relate
presently is rarely seen
being as rare as rocking horse
My personal story is minuscule compared to headline stories at the moment
however it is still revealing my inner strength
As I go around for the umpteenth lap on this pattern and my son asks me often why don’t I learn?
Why do I have to do it again ?
It affects him too and part of me takes issue with myself about this.
All I can answer is…..
there is more learning to do for me personally
and new people involved
and always a new angle
one of the key things is
I learn about how the cycles work through my own experience
and now that is so clear using astrology and the Mayan Wavespell.
To be a Seer one has to see through cycling the cosmic cookie trail 🙂
Taking the path less travelled involves this uncomfortable rocky road
only uncomfortable sometimes at the
dark moments where the next step isn’t clear….
most of the other discomfort is my ego in fear mode
and the more I go through these gateways and
enjoy the magic that comes as a result
and the easier it gets to
be pushed through the wormhole into a new chapter.
I don’t expect anyone to nanny me or be financially responsible for me
I do want to be independent and live authentically ……
the question is in today’s western world…..
How is that possible?
To create shelter and a good standard of harmonious , healthy living
without prostituting oneself in some way?
Answers on a postcard please 🙂
I am so open to your inspiring ideas at this time.
I have resources and sometimes they are capped by my
knowing what I know
and you know
something else 🙂
Because you have lived a life different to mine.
I am once more at Hecate’s Crossroads ready to take
another road less travelled
keep the faith
in my soul journey.
I am in conflict with my selves this past couple of days in waning Gemini moon
and as we slipped into Cancer today
I am feeling my mothering adrift.
My ego conditioning is still looking to be that good girl who has created a blissful life of brownie points
a legacy for my offspring that will stand testament to their future
and my soul self says
what utter tripe and nonsense 🙂
My Sacred feminine archetype of Taurus energy stands firm and grounded
and reminds me that there is still more brainwashing
to be sluiced out
this consumer cultishness still has some strong tendrils that run deep is all.
The Narcissist thread was heavily robed in The Great Gatsby.
This is the Sagittarius challenge
discipline and balance with the expansion
the upward ever growing, expanding line on the stock exchange of ego
that forever ascends
no roller coaster circles here my dear
white and bright
Narcissists cannot deal with flexibility and have rigid rules
and when their rules are not obeyed
their rage is unleashed
All that unprocessed emotion comes out like molten lava
Anyone who is waiting for a miracle to occur with a narcissist
in the way of empathy or any true feelings to be shown of love or compassion
It will never happen
because it isn’t a possibility for this person who has never learned to love
and has created an inpenetrable wall around their heart
manned by nihilistic robots
Heal from the pain the relationship has brought and
to relate with beings who are capable of living from a love space
My long term partner has faced his worse nightmare over the past week and has been totally physically incapacitated and in great pain
He normally works as a builder and yet even though he has kept people in the loop about his condition
they wouldn’t accept that reality 😦
and had no compassion for him at all
Which has led to another end of a cycle
We have worked for many people who loved us when we did everything they wanted
and the minute we said
the tables turned.
We have tried all sorts of strategies to avoid interacting with people in this way
and have come to a conclusion
If one can possibly avoid this type of co dependent relationship
who have healthy honest relationships
these people are rare
I cannot live out of integrity as I get sick
so it isn’t an option any more.
In a coaching session this week I received the name Javier/Xavier
and one of the meanings is “new home”
of course anyone I am working with is another me 🙂
We have the same path in many ways
A for sale sign appeared outside my home today and this echoes times past.
I felt dread because I have just settled in and last time finding a home was quite traumatic
I feel tired at the thought of packing everything up even though we may be able to stay if the new owner chooses to keep us as tenants
and so many other times of being made to go ~ as a child I didn’t want to leave my first home and friends
I left a beautiful place in the country because of a bullying boss
I left a company that sounded wonderful and was just a slave driver
I left a dream home because of a financial crash
all of these circles felt like something my ego didn’t choose and
they all led me here 🙂
How will I create with the circumstances this time?
I have been playing a single parent role in many ways this week, doing many things my partner does as well as my own and assisting him in some ways.
This has reflected times past too.
I have had very little time to relax and tune in because I have been “doing”
This is how the co dependent designed society keeps us going as busy little worker bees with no time or energy to think outside the box.
On a finding new tires adventure I went on a half hour journey to a new place using sat nav
my sat nav wouldn’t charge and so I had to keep stopping to see where to go by plugging it in
and I saw the metaphor of taking the small steps
go a little
check in with the signs
My ego doesn’t bode well with this approach as it means it cannot risk assess and draw up a flawless master plan to avoid any
scraped knees and bruised feelings
My beloved ego only wants what is “good” for me
and this isn’t what soul journeys are about.
Soul Journeys are often given the biggest boost at times of adversity.
This is the lovely Scorpio embrace that drags us into the deep spaces where
My partner is in the last couple of days of his eleventh year and so big letting go time and everything for him is now at a standstill so he can create something new.
At my last major journeying point into Glastonbury I wasn’t blogging ~
this time you can share my journey with me and see what that brings
inside and out
Next wave spell begins on November 26th with Blue Hand
this is my Mayan Sign.
It brings the doorway through to another world and is the transformational 13 days of shaping to connect with the Goddess.
The blend of what is seeking birth through our great mother energy and each of us, through letting the magic flow through us
from our heart space
if we can transform our ego
with humility and grace
Remember that it is the lightening and solar flares that charge mother earth
and our co creative relationships that allow us
rather than simply survive.
Love to you all at this time of creating new cosmic waves
through leaving our caves.